Peas and Thank You

The Best of P&TY: A Mighty Wind

 

I think I can still hear the recorder from Maui. Maybe she’ll leave it at Mimi and Poppy’s?

Originally posted: August 29, 2011

Any time I have to go somewhere and leave Pea Daddy in charge, I get scared.

I’m not scared the girls will get hurt, be underfed or even that they will walk around with mismatched clothes and unkempt hair. I’m not here, why should I care?

My main concern now is what I will return home to. It’s happened before:

A new tree. Not a bouquet of flowers in a subtle vase. An entire living, breathing tree that someone paid for with an enormous amount of money and then had to plant in an enormous hole. Good thing Pea Daddy had that shovel handy when he had to explain it to me.

A new easel. Not a drawing pad and a box of crayons. An entire four-feet tall scaffold with dry erase pens, chalk and giant rolls of butcher paper on which to make the biggest picture in the world. Daily.

A new bookshelf. Not a new book or even demure book ends. An entire set of four ominous, black iron shelves now overflowing with real books. And pineapple-shaped Tommy Bahama bookends. And an unopened Kindle.

When I left to go the conference on Saturday, Pea Daddy and the girls were headed out in a wagon to do one of the few things I’d prefer they’d do without me. (Please add, “See The Smurfs” to that list.)

They went garage sale-ing.

I can’t stand garage sales. I have enough of my own crap in my own house that I don’t want (see Tommy Bahama bookends). Why would I pay even a nominal amount of money for someone else’s crap?

Especially someone else’s crap that has had their mouth on it.

Shiver.

For some reason I will never be able to explain, Pea Daddy thought it would be a good idea to let Gigi bring home this little treasure.

And it is her new best friend. Can inanimate objects be best friends?

I know firsthand that they can be sworn enemies.

“I’ll get you, Recorder, if it’s the last thing I do!”

Gigi has been playing the blasted thing non-stop. She knows one note.

It might be “C.” Although, it’d be far more appropriate if it were “F.” Because that’s what comes to mind for me whenever she gets the recorder out.

A lack of notes doesn’t stop her, though, from playing one-note versions of “Happy Birthday,” “Row Row Row Your Boat,” and what she today claimed was “The Mommy Cooking Show Theme Song.” We may have some copyright infringement issues, though because it sounded an awful lot like “Happy Birthday” (and “Row Row Row Your Boat.”) And I do mean an awful lot.

We’ve had to institute some household rules to prevent me from piercing my own eardrops with cake pop sticks.

1. No playing the recorder before anyone else is awake. I’ve told Gigi that sometimes I sleep with my eyes open. Today I worked out, ate breakfast and baked a cake all while being sound asleep. Shhh…don’t wake me up.

2. No playing the recorder while eating. We had eleven snacks before lunch. It must be a growth spurt.

3. No playing the recorder while Mommy or Daddy is driving. I’m planning a road trip tomorrow. I hear Argentina is nice this time of year.

4. Always love each other and encourage our passions and dreams. As Gigi played “Happy Row Your Boat Theme Song” today, Lulu exclaimed, “Gigi! That was BEAUTIFUL!”

Then Gigi turned to serenade a rock, and Lulu showed me how she really felt.

So we had a snack. While sleeping. And driving to Argentina.