Wannabe Recipea: Goldfish Crackers
Lulu might be taking her self-imposed lessons in empathy a little too far.
Yesterday she sat in her baby doll stroller and rolled herself around the house, claiming to be in a wheelchair. I was going to put a kibosh on her game as being insensitive, but it came to a crashing end all on its own. Let’s just say our stairway is not up to ADA standards.
Today she’s pretending that a pair of blue Minnie Mouse sunglasses are actual eyeglasses and that she “can’t see a thing without them.” She’s walking around squinting, taking off her frames and rubbing her eyes like they are so fatigued from trying to see. She’s gone as far as giving herself pretend eye exams: “Do you like 1 or 2?” How about now? 1…or 2?”
The most alarming part of this whole game was when she removed the glasses, looked me up and down, in my jeans, T-shirt and unkempt hair and said, “Mom, I love you no matter what you look like.”
She says the sweetest things. I liked it better when she couldn’t see.
Especially at snack time.
*gluten and dairy-free
Makes approximately 4 1/2 c. of crackers
- 1 c. all-purpose gluten-free flour (i.e. Bob’s Red Mill)
- 1 c. garbanzo bean flour
- 3/4 t. xanthan gum
- 1 t. salt
- 1/4 t. dry mustard
- 1 c. non-dairy cheddar cheese (i.e. Daiya)
- 1/2 c. vegan margarine (i.e. Earth Balance)
- 5 T. cold water
Note: if you’d like to make a non-gluten free version, use 1 c. whole wheat pastry flour and 1 c. unbleached all-purpose flour and omit xanthan gum.
In the pitcher of a high speed blender or the bowl of a food processor, combine flours, xanthan gum, salt and mustard.
Pulse to combine. Add cheese and pulse again until fully incorporated.
Add margarine in small chunks and pulse, cutting it into the cheese flour.
Transfer the mixture to a large bowl.
Add water, one tablespoon at a time, stirring until a dough forms.
Transfer dough to a large piece of plastic wrap, form into a circle, wrap up and refrigerate for at least an hour.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Using a floured pin and board (gluten free all purpose flour is fine for these purposes too), roll dough out to about 1/4 –1/2 inch thick.
Cut crackers out using cookie cutters and carefully transfer to a baking sheet lined with parchment paper or a Silpat.
If you want to save time, or have children who are pretending to be visually impaired, you can simply cut the dough into squares and make an imprint with the end of a spoon or fork.
Bake for 10-14 minutes, until crackers are crisp and golden. Allow to cool before transferring to an airtight container.
They taste like goldfish. Salty, crunchy and deliciously cheesy.
They look like goldfish. Especially through a pair of cheap, child’s sunglasses.
You can make whatever shape you like, depending on your audience. I tried puppies, of course, but the pesky tail kept coming off.
Hence the squares. Cheez-Its don’t have tails.
The point is, these are tasty. They’re worth every extra bit of effort for your kiddos, even if you don’t have goldfish cookie cutters.
After all, as a wise blind woman once said, you’ll love them no matter what they look like.