Was Blind But Now I See
*Note: if you are sensitive to descriptions of medical procedures, breakfast cereal manufacturing or adults wearing plastic shoes, you may want to skip this post. Or toughen up, Cream Puff.
Today was the day.
That’s not me getting ready to go to work at the Honey Bunches of Oats factory. That’s me on drugs.
Pre-LASIK surgery.
After three days without makeup, 30 days in glasses and 25 years of being legally blind, I can now see.
It’s about time too, because for the last day, Pea Daddy has been ready to strangle me, primarily because I have been memorializing every move I have made. Out loud.
“This is the last time I will work out in my glasses.”
“This is the last time I will blow dry my hair in glasses.”
“This is the last time I will watch Conan while drinking a smoothie in my PJs…and my glasses.”
I think I may have even ruined the mood during a rather close moment together when I proudly announced that it was the last time to ever happen in my glasses. How inappropriate.
Though the procedure happened in a blink, I’d be lying if I said it was easy.
After arriving at the clinic, my eyelids were cleaned with an alcohol wipe and I was offered a Valium and an Altoid. I’m hoping the Altoid was because the Valium tasted bad and not because I hadn’t done a great job of brushing my teeth…for the last time in glasses.
Once things were nice and fuzzy, I met my surgeon. He was nice…and fuzzy, but I couldn’t help but feel a little anxious that he was wearing Crocs. Something just seems a little off when the person who is about to shoot a laser in your eyeball is wearing the same shoes as your three year-old. And Mario Batali. Although, I would have felt better about it had he first fixed me a plateful of gnocchi and some homemade sauce.
Soon thereafter, I was led back to a padded slab that was a cross between a dental chair and a massage table. It was set up in front of a large machine, that I assumed was the laser, and the whole setup was arranged behind a huge plate glass window and a row of chairs so Pea Daddy could observe. Then our whole team prayed, and I was actually quite calm. It was the Valium or God. I’m guessing a little of both.
I’m not going to tell you exactly what happened next. I’ll just throw a couple words at you to give you a feel for what happened.
Eye spring.
Suction ring.
Vacuum pressure.
Corneal flap.
Odor of burning corneal tissue.
It certainly wasn’t pleasant. I felt like a probing victim of an alien abduction. Only the probe was in my eye. Or more accurately, maybe it was more like I was a damsel in distress, restrained with ropes and edging closer to a saw blade. Only the saw blade was in my eye. Instead of flowing blond curls on my head, though, I looked like I was about to pack a delightfully crunchy and sweet breakfast cereal into a cardboard box. “You can taste the joy in every spoonful!”
When I came out of the procedure, I could see a bit better, but things were pretty blurry. My eyes also felt like Mama forgot to use the tear-free shampoo. But with each passing hour, my vision is improving. I’m dumping eye drops in by the bottleful. I’ve slept more today than I have in the last two weeks combined. Pea Daddy’s been making PB&J and runs to Target for artificial tears and a mysterious cereal craving that has suddenly hit.
But without glasses or contacts, I can see.
And it’s amazing. See you soon.
Congratulations on your LASIK victory! I am so jealous but so stoked for you!! And I am totally amused by the Altoid.
It was quite refreshing.
Mazel tov on being able to see… and how funny that I got a phone call today. My new glasses are ready.
Rock those frames, sister!
Glad to hear that the surgery was successful!!
Thanks!
Yay! I am so happy for you (and jealous!)! Heal quickly and enjoy those PB&J’s
Those are for the girls. The Honey Bunches of Oats are for me.
Good luck with your recovery! Take it easy and enjoy the down time
Thought about you today…so happy to hear your procedure was complete!
As always, enjoyed your before, during and after story. Before: hilarious. During: humorous and interesting.
After: I am sure there is more to come on that topic. For sure funny and awesome! And most of all ‘Thankful’ for the opportunity (for you) to not have any more blog on glasses!
I am so happy that you had the opportunity to get this procedure done.
Thank you so much, Kathe. I was sure my mom was probably giving you updates
Yes, no more blogging on glasses!
Glad the surgery went okay and glad you can see!!!! Hope your recovery goes well! I’ll be thinking about you!
Yay..so glad things went well!!! Love that you’re getting some r+r and chowing down on cereal. xoxo
Wow, I’ve always wondered what that surgery was like, and I now officially hope I never have to have it myself. Its awesome that you can see though! That’s exciting.
Okay I had no idea you would be up for posting. Your amazing! It all sounds so familiar, only funny jokes were set aside because it wasn’t me:) This is so exciting. Justin has been asking me about you and I told him I thought it was tomorrow. Oh well. So happy for you:)
Thank you, Ang. And thank Justin for me too. So far so good!
I’m very excited for you. Your recounting made me a little anxious all over again, but I still think it was one of the best things I ever did. Enjoy the view!
Thanks, hon. I can’t say I’d like to do it again, but so far, I’m glad I did it.
Gorgeous post! Did you take you forever to write it?! Well anyway, hoping for you best with your healing.
-A-
It did take me awhile with all the blurriness.
I dont even trust chefs that wear crocs. They are super dangerous in the kitchen because hot liquids can melt it and those holes dont do a great job of protecting you foot from anything sharp.
What are going to do with your glasses? glass case? future Halloween costume accessory? Maybe give it to a librarian that needs to be “sexed up”?
Hope you have a speedy recovery. But remember, as corny as it may sound, love is blind anyhow
I really hope to give them to a charitable organization, be it March of Dimes or somewhere else. They could really help someone out. Such a heavy prescription is not cheap.
If you have a Lion’s Club in the area they take old eyeglasses
Yes! That’s who I was thinking of. Thanks.
I can see clearly now, the rain is gone…..
A certain ex boyfriend, now best freind who shall remain nameless for the sake of this comment forgot that I was 10 inches shorter and wore glasses. He went in for a squeeze and then we heard the snap.
He has spent the past 3 years buying my love back in food
Oh no! I hope the hug was worth it. Or at least the food.
I think I may have even ruined the mood during a rather close moment together when I proudly announced that it was the last time to ever happen in my glasses. How inappropriate.
HAHAHAHAHAH!
yay! I so happy for u girl!
It’s probably such a hassle sometimes but not no more.
It’s crazy how they give crzy surgeries like that!
I would love to have Lasik done some day when I can afford it. I have a really low pain tolerance, though. Does it hurt much? My brother-in-law had it done and said it hurt a lot that day. But that was a while ago and maybe they improved the procedure?
I am so happy for you. I can imagine how liberating lens-free vision must be. Congratulations for your accomplishment!
Actual pain-wise, it wasn’t bad at all. The making of the flap was the worst part, which I would equate to a really bad poke in the eye. And then the burning that felt like soap lasted only for about an hour. Other than that, I’ve been pain free!
So glad you are okay, and that your humor seemed to have improved as much as your vision… I didn’t think it was possible for you to get any funnier, but maybe its the drugs?
Either way, you had me laughing while reading about a procedure that makes my legs hurt… That is hard to do, dude. Happy to hear everything went well, and i can relate to your odd cereal craving after a surgery… After my bone marrow biopsy i went searching for a natural version of Lucky Charms. Though I attribute that to the fact that my Doctor was Irish and wouldn’t shut up about how he used to eat the marshmallows out of the box and leave the rest for his sister. I guess if nothing else, it distracted me from the 16 gauge needle in my back..
It’s the drugs. Pea Daddy says he’d like to keep me in a steady stream of them at all times.
Congratulations on your freedom from glasses!
You are a much braver person than I.
What a great way to get ready for the new year! Congrats! Sending you good vibes for a speedy recovery!
For some reason I can handle videos of eye surgery on TLC but your description made me a bit squeamish. Glad you made it through and will be lens-free!
Sorry
I’m so glad everything went well! Yay for no more glasses! (Wish I could say the same for me.) Enjoy the rest, and the view.
All I can hear is Beyonce singing…”I’m a Survivor”…lol…way to go MP! You done good.
Toughen up Cream Puff (I”m SO using this!) ha!
Yes, take that kind phrase and make it your own.
I’ll be thinking of you girl. Just think, it will all be over in just a few hours and you will gain a lifetime of wonderful sight!
Praying for you!!!
Are you supposed to be on the computer already?! Glad that you are, cause I would have missed you, but I was told no television or computer for 48 hours.
They said as long as I continued to blink and flood with drops…and were just on for brief stints, I’d be fine. I wrote this post over the course of several hours.
Glad that the surgery went well!
Yayyy glad the surgery went well for you!! I hope you’re breaking the glasses ceremoniously
Nope I’m going to find them a good home!
Congratulations! My roommate just got the surgery a few weeks ago and can’t believe the difference; she calls it a miracle to get out of bed in the morning and not need to reach for glasses/contacts. Me, I’m still clinging to my contacts.
It really is miraculous!
I’ve been waiting to read this post ever since you first mentioned LASIK. Glad it went well and its over with. You look like a noodle in the chair pre-surgery. When I had mine LASIK a month ago, I was fascinated with the shoes my doctor wore. They were the Vibram FiveFinger Running shoes. They looked like gloves on her feet…?! Enjoy looking at things!!!
Now see, if he had had Vibrams on, I would have had instant faith.
Congrats! LASIK was the best thing I ever did. It’s been nearly 2 years for me and I can still see as well as the first day post-op!
I’m really excited for the post-op today. They still have a “band-aid” contact on my eye, which I know is affecting my vision. So I expect things to be clearer when that is gone!
so exciting! hope that you have a very speedy recovery from surgery.
thats great! so exciting! good luck recovering, make yourself some dough balls, without glasses now, ouhhhh! hahah
I’m glad it went well! I totally understand about the crocs on your surgeon – I volunteer on the hospital and can’t belive that some of these neurosurgeons and ER docs are wearing brightly colored crocs! Like, how does anyone take them seriously?
They are one step away from clown shoes.
Congrats! Even if your words did scare me and my 20/400 vision
Congratulations on your new eyes Sarah! That is awesome! I am a little jealous. Maybe that is in the cards for me one day. I have to say, I am still totally freaked out, but I think with the right amount of sedatives, I could get through it! Enjoy your new vision!
Thank you! I hope I didn’t freak you out more.
I’m so glad it went well! Your awesome!
Glad it’s over and that it went well! Enjoy the down time!
Congrats on ditching the glasses!
I love my crocs. I used to make fun of them, said I would never wear them, but over time I realized the error of my ways and now I am a proud member of the croc fanclub. Having comfy feet is important for any task, including lasering someone’s eye tissue
Fair enough. At least he didn’t have Jibbitz in them.
My husband and I both had lasik several years ago. I let him go first (by several weeks). I figured if it turned out for him then I’d go ahead with the procedure. The worst mistake I made was to watch his procedure, on a tv monitor, that showed just a close up of his eye. Why did I watch that!
You got valium???? I didn’t get an valium! All I got was a stress ball to squeeze. I compare lasik to a gyn exam — very uncomfortable during, but over very fast.
But having things stuck “down there” is a lot less scary than things stuck in your eye. At least in my opinion…
I think this is why I’d have trouble actually getting lasik done. I can’t even wear contacts ’cause it would involve sticking something in my eye! It probably doesn’t help that I’m light sensitive too… Do they shine light in your eyes the whole time?
Yes. They do
HAHA! I totally agree, actually. Even regular eye exams make me twitchy.
I’m so glad everything went well! Lasik scares the bejeezus out of me for some reason. I have horrible anxiety about anything other than MY hands getting near my eyes. I FREAK!
Yeah, then maybe this wouldn’t be for you
Brave you! My husband had LASIK a few years ago and I’m incredibly jealous of his ability to see perfectly now! I am so so so scared of the procedure…I haven’t been able to suck it up and get it done! Congrats on your new eyeballs!
It is relatively quick. If you are a candidate, it’s definitely worth the “scary” factor.
Congrats girl! That is so exciting!!
I’m so happy to hear that everything went well! Lasik is on my dream list in the next few years, too – my vision is horrible!
It is so amazing. If you are a candidate, I would highly suggest it.
congrats on your new eyes!
ugh lasik has got to be the greatest gift known to man. i mean to wake up and be able to see clearly?! what’s it like!
Well, I’m not able to see totally clearly yet but I think after today’s post-op visit I will. There is still a contact in my eye to act as a bandage, and it’s covered in medications, eye drops, etc. So I expect what’s that is gone, I’ll be a lot clearer!
Congrats! I’m so glad it’s over and that it went relatively well. I hope you are enjoying sleep, drugs, cereal and seeing everything.
P.S. Did the procedure feel like Pea Kitty was clawing your eyes out?
A little bit. Shame on you for suggesting such a thing.
Okay, here’s my big question for you…
Did it hurt?
I really want to do it, and I have a really good pain tolerance, but I feel like pain in my eye is a whole different beast!
Congrats on your vision!
I just responded to another comment that asked the same, but no, it didn’t really hurt. The making of the flap was a bit painful, like a poke in the eye, and then the residual burning lasted about an hour, but other than that, it was totally painless!
Glad to hear that the surgery went well! I love your retelling!
Super Jealous!!! My prescription looks like yours…Maybe some year….for now I’m poor and still nervous about it. Darn these kiddos and their daycare bill
The price has come down so much…in a few years I bet it is even more affordable. And maybe even covered by insurance.
YAY! So happy for you, and relieved everything went well. HUGS!
Good for you!
i am just so excited for you…i have dreamt of lasik for a long time! must be nice to see again
Congrats!! Glad it went well!
I am SO jealous!!! I hope to get this done sometime in the future.
So amazing and so happy for you. When I was in high school a friend had Lasik done because she hated her glasses and could no longer where contacts. She tried them all. She said being able to wake up and see immediately without reaching for assistance–from contacts or glasses–was amazing. She also received the procedure on DVD to watch at home! I never watched it with her … darn.
Now that would be awesome. I would force everyone to watch my DVD with me.
Yeah!! I was thinking about you yesterday, as I was religiously applying my drops. Can’t believe you were blogging last night. I was down for the count the entire evening after mine. And, believe it or not, my eye doctor was wearing CROCS as well, which freaked me out a bit. I don’t mean to get all “mother” on you, but remember to rest your eyes. The blog world will wait for you for a few days.
Yes, yes, yes. Thank you, “Mom.” Glad you are recovering well too!
“Toughen up, cream puff.” haha!
I was praying for you yesterday. I’m so glad your surgery was a success. My husband had LASIK years before I met him…which is a good thing because I’m not sure I would have glanced twice at him, had he been wearing his hideous glasses. There, I said it! Don’t judge! Now, I’M the one who gets to where hideous glasses.
*wear*–I promise I really CAN spell.
That cracks me up that you admit you wouldn’t have looked twice.
Thanks for your prayers.
Yay for LASIK and no more glasses! I’m living vicariously through you for not – I am too chicken to even get tested to see if I’m a candidate! Everyone I know that has had the surgery insists that although it wasn’t the most pleasant experience they’d do it again in a heartbeat. Some have even likened it to childbirth – no fun at all while it’s happening but the payoff is worth the pain. (Which also scares the bejesus out of me!)
Can’t wait to hear how the recovery goes & when the blurriness is gone!
Oh, please! This was so much easier than pushing an almost 8 lb. Livy out of my nether regions. If you are interested, you should check it out. Absolutely worth the sacrifices.
I’ve always had Lasik surgery in the back of my mind. My eyes definitely aren’t as bad as yours were, but it would be so nice to no longer need contacts. Thanks for sharing the details. I’ll keep what you said in mind if I decide to get it. And I will make SURE I get the Valium. I’m sure you’re so happy it’s finished! A great start to a new year.
Feel free to ask me any questions, if you have them still!
Congrats Mama Pea!!
How exciting!!! Glad to hear the surgery went well!!
I commend you for your bravery because I couldn’t have done it. I’m glad to hear that it went well. Congrats!
You’d be surprised what you could do!
Congrats! I’m slightly terrified of having it done – for now I’m rocking my contacts
Very exciting, you are one brave woman to face that brutal eyeball cutting machine and live to tell the tale with comedic flare!
I don’t know about brave. But thanks!
Hhahaha, on, you know how to make surgical procedures hilarious.
As I sit here reading ‘in my glasses’ because I’m nursing my first cup of coffee and contacts aren’t an option until I won’t mistake a dish plate for my lenses.
My Mom had LASIK done in the late 90s (ya know, back in tha DAY, when it was new and crazy) and it was VIDEOTAPED. Your disclaimer was nice and the description is nothing compared to the visual I once stumbled upon my Dad (surgeon/Dr) watching. OOF.
Glad to hear your eyes are clearing up with cereal & fake tears
Congrats! I am excited for you and hope it all goes well
4 eyes are NOT better than 2 =)
congrats MP… i’m willing to be seen in public with you again now that the glasses are gone! haha
let me know if you and / or the other Peas need anything!
xOxO
What a friend!
Hope you had a good Christmas, Sus.
I have enjoyed your journey through your writing – thanks! I can’t even remember the year, but I had radial keratotomy done on my eyes because of the hard contact lenses that I’d worn for 32 years, and the “coke bottle bottom” glasses since 4th grade. One month – ONE MONTH – after the procedure, they approved the lasik surgery. My doc had plenty of experience doing lasik, as countries south of the border were doing it routinely, and he spent many months helping in Mexico and central America. But not allowed to do it here – until a month after my RK. Blew my mind, since he made the scalpel incisions in my eyeballs with his right hand for the right eye and his left hand for my left eye. Now you’ve got me thinking I could maybe do the lasik. We’ll see.
So HAPPY FOR YOU, Sarah! The world’s a whole ‘nother place, isn’t it?
It truly is a whole new world. It is so strange to think that my eyes are forever changed! If it’s an option for you, maybe you could consider the LASIK. Thank you for your well wishes.
Congratulations! So happy to hear that everything went well
Congratulations on making it through! You’re one tough pea cookie! You make me really thankful for my vision (not perfect, but I don’t need LASIK). =) It’s amazing how many things we take for granted until you lose them or hear about others losing them. Make sure you keep your glasses so later you can be reminded to truly appreciate your sight.
Lots of Love,
Anna
P.S.
Be thankful for your full hearing in your left ear and thankful for the top section of your left middle finger! I’m okay without those, but it wouldn’t hurt to have them back. So appreciate and love all of what your body is able to do for you while you can! =)
Gosh, there is a story there! I’m sorry for your losses
so no dorky goggles to be worn for the next week?
lucky!
I have a pair of plastic goggles that look like a snowboarding mask that I wear to bed. It’s cute.
Glad to see that you can see
and that everything went well.
Hooray! I’ve wanted laser surgery for years, but my eyes keep getting worse, so I’m going to have to wait a while…sigh. (It kind of terrifies me anyway) – I’m so excited for you to be able to see without contacts/glasses – I can’t wait for that day!!
Yay, I am glad everything went well Mama Pea! Hope your eyes are as clear as it could be today!
Ana
Great post. If it’s any comfort, my nurse mom wears Crocs to work and she has, well, years of experience.
Congrats, so happy it’s over and went well!
Oh. Well, my sincerest apologies to your mom
Congratulations on your lasik surgery! I hope the rest of your recovery goes well!
So glad things went smoothly!! Hope your eyes continue to heal beautifully and that you aren’t too drugged up to commemorate all the new firsts “this is the first PB&J I’ve eaten…with my new eyes”
Now that you mention it, I did email Pea D this morning and say, “I loved my first shower without my glasses.” And then, “I loved blowing drying my hair without glasses.” You are right…the fun never has to end!
Glad it went okay! Congratulations:)
Yay! I’m so glad you’re doing well post-LASIK! Just keep up with the drops, hydration is so key!
I think the thing that frustrated me the most is that my 2 usual activities during “down time” are reading and watching tv. I had my surgery on a Friday, what a LONG, BORING weekend that was! LOL
I know. I was DYING last night. And you can only sleep so much…
LOL, I was JUST about to say that you can now say “oh, this is the first time I’ve done ____ with no corrective lenses” but I see Brittany has beaten me to it
I think Pea Daddy may as well just give up.
Congratulations on your improved PEA-pers!
I think Pea Daddy gave up a long time ago.
Congrats!! Although the surgery was no picnic I’m sure you’re going to love the outcome after recovery. Think of how nice it’ll be to never have to worry about glasses/contacts/blurry vision again
.
Wow, that sounds like a TOUGH surgery … I am glad you are starting to see clearly now
No more glasses, wooo!!
Yay for seeing clear now! im so happy the surgery worked so well!!!! xoxo
Congrats!! Glad it’s over with for you
Phew…so glad this is all over and done with for you! Take some down time for yourself and just relax!
I hope to let my eyes rest a little tonight.
omg sarah i am so excited for you! i could cry; love it. cannot wait to get mine done. and i appreciate the play by play…takes me back to those days when i worked under and od and md who did these all day long. fun times
enjoy it!
Then you must know all about it! And you’re still going to get it done? You are the brave one
Congrats! What a brave lady you are for not running out of the doctors office in that lovely head gear the second you laid your eyes on a pair of doc crocs. Enjoy your new vision!
Thank you…I will!
Congrats on getting your vision back! Also, I wanted to say thank you for all your great recipes, this is the only place I have found that has consistently delicious vegan food. With in the past week alone I’ve made your pumpkin roasted chick peas, pumpkin bread pudding, chocolate chip cookies, energy bars, quinoa zucchini lasagna, and pb dough balls (and they’ve all passed my extreme carnivore of a father’s taste test). Can’t wait for your book to come out! : ) Happy Holidays!
I’m so so glad!!! Thank you so much for the kind words.
I’m glad it all went well. And the cereal jokes are perfect. Can’t wait for you to say “This is the first picture with my new eyes.”
Me too.
Glad you are doing well
Even in the face of eye surgery you have a sense of humor – so, if you ever stop joking I’ll worry. Take good care until you feel 100%.
I’ll never stop joking. On my death bed I’ll be cracking “That’s what she said” jokes.
So brave! I’ve wanted to have it done, but I get too nervous. It took my 3 tries to actually get contacts in my eyes. Maybe another 3 years will give me the courage for lasik. Keep dropping in those drops!
Yes! Thanks for reminding me!
You will never regret this! BTW most medical people wear crocs cause we are too lazy to tie our shoes, course that probably doesn’t make you feel any better. Seriously, I’m happy for you and the new world (without glasses) that you get to experience.
Thank you, Rhonda. I’m still in the transition period, but I hope I won’t regret it! And Pea Daddy tells me the doc took his crocs off and it was all done in socks!
i was laughing so hard while reading this. i even had to read the honey bunches bit and the crocs bit to marsh so he could enjoy the comedy. and he did. i think lasik made you funnier. you know how people sometimes get boob jobs when they get their tubes tied? (or at least it was common in the 80s and early 90s.. my mom told me so!) it was like that. only with lasik and a tweaking of the funny part of your brain.
i want lasik. no, really, not just for the secret procedure to make me funnier. but to make it so i don’t have to wear these damn contacts anymore. i don’t know if i could handle it though. can’t they knock you out?
corneal flap? you’re gross. but you’re funny, so it evens out and i will keep reading. i guess.
Drugs do make me funnier. But I’ve heard people die that way.
Loved your post tonight…I think you’ll love Gigi’s song too.
Even without all the graphic details of the procedure (which I pretty much know anyways), it’s great to hear about your experience with lasik. They have told me that I’m a candidate, but I’m a bit creeped out to have surgery I don’t technically required to function. Plus I don’t like what it would do to my bank account. Damn universal medical – makes me not want to pay for anything! Glad to hear it all went well
WOOHOO!!! Congrats! It’s funny – I’d completely forgotten a lot about the procedure, but after reading your post I do recall all of what you wrote. I think the scariest thing for me was that you’re actually “blind” for a split second. Even though it wasn’t a pleasant experience I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.
So happy for you;)
And for your husband…;)
Just like giving birth..I guess…hate the procedure, but the outcome is sooo worth it;)
and btw…you truely wear the headgear..;) great…I see you kept the running shoes on..just in case…
You sitting in that chair looking so full of inner peace …or maybe it’s just the drugs;)
Congratulations and all the best to you;)
Kirsten, Denmark, Scandinavia
Thank you, Kirsten. Still waiting for that moment when I feel 100% right about it, since I’m still recovering. But thank you so much for your well-wishes.
I’m so jealous! Congrats on being coke-bottle free – you deserve it!
Thanks, girl. Hope you are feeling well these days!
So excited for you MP! I admit I have read about the procedure before and it really freaks me out but I can tell it was worth it! I can’t even put on mascara without getting super close to the mirror. At some point, I am definitely going to get Lasik, if only for the free altoid. Ha. So random!
Every day it gets a little bit better. I could go for an Altoid right now, though.
You know that joke about fortune cookies, that you just add “…in bed” after every one and it becomes an instant classic? I feel like that’s what you’ve done for “…in my glasses.”