Pea Mail: On Being Social
The weekend has officially caught up to me, and so has my inbox. So rather than make a healthier vegan granola for you this morning, I thought I’d answer a question that was asked of me several times over the weekend. It’s not, “Why is your child eating the butter balls of my plate like they are gumdrops?” (this happened at the wedding reception and it was Lulu. She likes butter more than Paula Deen).
The question instead is, “How do you deal with food alienation? I don’t want to be a food snob (or have people worry about what to cook when they have me over) but I also don’t want to sell-out to my beliefs.”
Good question, Charlie and Amy!
The answer is really simple: I only hang out with people who believe what I believe, do what I say and eat what I eat.
Of course that is not true at all. I do feel very fortunate that my good friend Deb’s family transitioned to vegetarian/quasi-veganism around the same time my family did, so dinner parties like we had last night are totally stress-free, aside from figuring out who gets the red Popsicle.
For the record, we made a delicious pizza on Trader Joe’s Wheat Pizza Dough topped with pizza sauce, Daiya mozzarella, sauteed onions, mushrooms and yellow squash tomatoes, olive tapenade and fresh basil. And veggie pepperoni on Pea Daddy’s half.
The kids had veggie pepperoni and pineapple.
And Deb made a totally addictive salad of greens, snow peas, carrots, broccoli, avocados, Goddess dressing and hemp seeds.
I’m holding her package of Daiya mozzarella ransom until she gives me the exact salad recipe because even now I want to eat it for breakfast.
But let me wipe my drool off the keyboard and get back to the question at hand. Here are my exact tips for dealing with social situations, friends and family that don’t eat the same way we do:
- Don’t ask, don’t tell. This rule applies to many things in life, for better or worse. No one likes to be preached to, about religion, about politics and definitely not about food. When I’m at a social gathering, you won’t even hear the word “vegan” out of my mouth, and I’m certainly not walking around saying, “I can’t believe YOU are eating that,” or even “I can’t eat that!” I see it as a personal choice, not something that I need to inform everyone else about. If they are interested and ask, I’ll be as honest and casual as I can about it, but I don’t approach gatherings as a time to push any sort of agenda. It’s a time to enjoy my family and friends.
- Do your research and prepare accordingly. If I’m meeting friends or family at a restaurant, I’ll often go online ahead of time to see what I can order. It’s even possible to call restaurants and see what vegan options they can offer even if they aren’t on the menu. If I’m feeling assertive, I might suggest a restaurant that I know has good options for meat-eaters and vegans alike, but I try to be tactful about it. And in those instances when I just don’t know what to expect, and even those that I do, I try to eat a little something before I hit the party/restaurant and I always carry a filling snack in my purse, like a Larabar, nuts, a piece of fruit, etc. and that way if I need to stick to a salad or sides, I can munch on something on the way home. And I’ve been known to smuggle PB&J for the girls.
- Share your food. This is probably the tip I utilize the most, and really it is appreciated by my friends and family as well. Whenever I get an invite, I always say what most people do, “What can I bring?” Most people are relieved that they don’t have to worry about what to feed me, and often are excited to try whatever I’ve cooked up, be it a hearty side dish that can double as my entree (i.e. Curry Chickpea Salad) or even just a batch of homemade veggie burgers (i.e. Yukon Gold Potato and White Bean Basil Burgers) to serve up next to everyone’s beef burgers. And seriously, who is going to turn down a cupcake, vegan or not?
- Share yourself. If a friend or family member has questions about my lifestyle, I’m an open book. I share my blog. I offer to loan the books that helped form my beliefs, like Skinny Bitch and Diet for a New America. I tell them about Food, Inc. I don’t preach, but I make the information available and share my opinions if, and only if, they ask.
- Prioritize. Sometimes I just have to weigh what’s most important to me, and believe it or not, that’s not always food. I’m not saying to throw your convictions out the door for others, but there have been times where I’ve tried a non-vegan dish or went to a restaurant that wouldn’t have been my first choice because being with my friends and family is more important to me than being vegan. I explained this to Gigi the other day when she was asking why some people eat meat. I explained that it is a personal choice and not something we should ever use to act like we are better than someone else or to make other people feel bad. I used an example that I knew would hit home for her: the fact that she refuses to wear pants.
Unlike my veganism, this is something that Gigi is militant about. But I told her that if her best girlfriend Avery came over wearing pants, she wouldn’t make Avery feel bad about not choosing to wear a dress. Granted there are not a lot of ethical differences involved when deciding to put on a pink tutu or khaki cargos, but the premise is the same:
It’s okay for our friends and family to make different choices from us. It doesn’t make us better. It doesn’t make us love them less. It just makes us different. And our differences are how we learn and how we grow.
I’ve now got to try to disguise my voice, call Deb and make some demands.
Give me the salad recipe and nobody gets hurt.
is pea daddy jack johnson’s biggest fan?
Thank you for this post, I’ve been struggling with this lately. We are a month and a half into veganism, and after a couple of BBQ’s and pool parties, I was in desperate need of some advice. Because like you said, you don’t want to make people feel bad, and no matter what, that is how it comes across. My daughter just started kindergarten last week, so I will definitely be having that conversation with her. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!!
I’ve been a vegetarian for over 12 years, and my family will still often make a big deal out of what I’ll have to eat at gatherings. The answer? Plenty. There are always various salads and sides, and I’ll often bring something. I will try to change the venue if it’s a steakhouse, but even then there’s usually something to eat (and most places are pretty accommodating when you say that mushrooms are not a good substitute because not all vegetarians love mushrooms…I mean, it’s all good!).
And like you, I don’t mind sharing my views, but I never bring it up unless I’m asked. And I find others end up being more defensive about issues than I am. I do what works for me; do what you like, as long as you let me do what I like.
This post is totally great! The worst thing for me is when people start grilling me (instead of their burgers): that is, I can’t handle when people say things like, “WHY ARE YOU A VEGAN? LIKE SERIOUSLY COME ON COWS NEED TO BE MILKED, SARAH, AND CHICKENS LAY EGGS REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT YOU CHOOSE TO EAT THEM. AND WHY SHOULDN’T WE USE WHAT THEY GIVE US? GOOOSHHH!” It’s never really that extreme, but it is often there in the backdrop and it is just uncomfortable. I don’t grill people about their meat-eating habits, and I don’t get why my don’t-eat-meat-or-dairy habits warrant any sort of questioning.
Well put! This is something I have struggled with awhile, ever since meeting my now-in-laws, who not only center everything around meat/fast food, but also center all get-togethers around food. There was no way for me to hide that I was vegan, and usually nothing I could eat (even the salads would have bacon bits already mixed in, and the green beans would come with big chunks of ham… or spam!). I got called out on it A LOT in the beginning, but never responded in a combative manner. I think it might have made them uncomfortable that I wasn’t partaking in what were usually very unhealthy dishes. Now that I’m married and my husband is vegan, too, things have gotten a lot better — but as I am currently 9 wks pregnant, I’m not sure how the whole “vegan child raising” will go over, and will look to you for how to gracefully handle that conversation when it comes!
I have wondered this for awhile…
Do you ever wonder if Pea Daddy is slammin’ White Castle sliders at lunch? I think it’s great he supports your decision for your family!
When I was eating hardcore vegan, I could SMELL what my husband ate for lunch. I asked him one day why the crook of his neck smelled like a cheeseburger, he looked at me like I was insane! I could also smell it when he would eat ground turkey, which smells awful in the first place! He has adopted a lot of my now flexitarian ways (I chose a plant based diet because I have arthritis and I can tell a massive difference when I consume too much dairy and animal products.), but in the past, he was against it, well, just because. We have talked a lot about both going total vegan, but he is having a hard time committing.
I really don’t think that he is. Maybe at first he wasn’t coming home and shouting, “I had chicken for lunch!!!” if he did, but now I really believe it is his personal choice for himself. And even if he chooses to eat meat again someday, I’m not going to have an issue with it. I’m just not going to cook it
So well put, MP, as always I appreciate your values despite not being a vegetarian myself. I really do believe diet is such a personal thing, not in respect to because of ethics or beliefs, but because of genetics/body chemistry, budget, culture, special needs, etc. I love that you recognize that and do what is best for you and your family without judging the choices of others.
…by the way, I hope you didn’t have too much fun over the weekend with your friends and family. Don’t you have a house to clean?!
How does vegan cheese compare to cow’s milk cheese? I adore cheese though I only drink almond milk, and it would be awesome to break free of my cheese addiction.
Daiya is the only brand I would really recommend. Otherwise, I just go without.
have gigi or lulu ever Wanted meat or omething non vegan or have they never shown an interest?
The girls aren’t 100% vegan, and they really have had no interest in meat. But it isn’t forbidden. At the wedding, they were offered chicken fingers, and Lulu had a bite on her fork ready to eat it but then sniffed it and put it down. I didn’t say a word. I know this won’t always be the case, and as long as they know what it is that they are eating (without judgment), I’ll let them make their own decision.
I just bring my own side dish or something I will eat.
This was such a great post, that I’m bookmarking it for future reference. I often feel uncomfortable in social situations because of the way I eat; even if I try not to bring it up, it feels like someone’s always remarking on the fact that I’m only eating sides or that I passed up homemade cheeseburgers. The fact that I used to barely eat anything at all in social situations (ED) makes me even more self conscious, because a lot of people watch what I’m eating. I think it gets easier the older you get, because there are fewer and fewer “authority” figures, but right now I’m still at the point where I have to be uber polite to friends’ parents, everyone at work, and professors. It’s tough to explain things and not be a snob, but you’re so right- I don’t judge people for how they eat, so why should they judge me?
i love this post…i’m not vegan or even vegetarian, but even then if i make a healthier choice that seems “odd” i get questioned on it! i love that you state that it’s a personal choice…no one likes a political agenda shoved in their face! steps like you talked about are the best way to win people over anyway
Oh Sarah thanks for the post. It’s a struggle for me to not force all of the info I am learning about food on the ones I love. I feel like it comes from a good place but I am realizing how protective people are of their food choices. I guess I need to reverse the roles and think how I would feel if someone tried to do the same to me now. This post helped me take a step back so thank you.
I don’t comment often but absolutely LOVE your blog. Always makes me smile, laugh, and overall have a better day. I love this post…so thoughtful and well-put. Thanks for sharing!
Bravo. This is a wonderful post. I have very slowly been moving my family to vegetarian / vegan. I know members of my own family are not enthused by this transition so I have been trying to making this process as painless as possible. So thanks for the ncouragement to move forward.
Great post! I haven’t been vegan long, so I’ve only been out to a restaurant to eat once or twice, and I haven’t had any huge family meals; I know they have no idea what to do with me!! But anyway, beside the point – I really like what you said, and I totally agree about not forcing views on people – it often totally backfires anyway.
Good stuff!
i love this! you are totally right on every point and I have tried my hardest to live by all of those while i’m out with my family and friends. you’re teaching your girls great lessons for the long run.
I just wanted to say what an amazing post this is. I like how you explain what you do in those situations and I agree with all of your points – being with friends and family should come before fulfilling eating preferences (though it can be difficult at times).
I also think it’s great that you give your children the option to choose how they want to eat and that you’re not a snob about how you eat or how others eat. You’re a great role model for anyone who prefers to have a different style of eating habits than what’s “common” or “normal.” Again, awesome post! ^_^
I’d say I am probably more “militant” than you, for example I care AS much about my veganism as friends and family. But i’ve learned that you can’t convert everyone just because you love them. i figure the best i can do is be the best vegan i can be and if they are interested, they know who to come to for advice.
the whole pants thing could be worse. our friend’s kid refused to wear pants. but it wasn’t like he was wearing a skirt or dress. he just wanted to go naked on the bottom.
love! i wish more people could respect others lifestyle decisions, no matter how ‘crazy’ or ‘not normal’ they seem. i truly hate when people question what i’m eating, like it’s such a big deal! it’s my choice to not eat meat or not consume tons of dairy, and frankly, none of their business!!
great post, and the girls are adorable, as always!!
First time commenter, here!
I just wanted to chime in and say that I believe your first point is a very important one. I think the issue is that even if you’re not preaching your lifestyle choices to others, they often still get very defensive…as if they interpret your mere decision as preaching. I’ve always tried to remind myself that when people lash out – by making rude comments or stupid jokes or whatever – it’s actually because they are feeling attacked or insecure about their own choices. Knowing that their comments are coming from a place of fear or discomfort helps keep me from getting angry or defensive in return. Instead, I hope that someday they will self-reflect on the emotions that my lifestyle choice brought up inside of them.
I completely agree with all your points. My grandfather (a retired Army colonel) told me that I was unpatriotic for not eating meat. Umm, I work for the government and I eat locally grown produce from farmer’s markets. And I’m pretty sure McDonald’s (one of his fave restaurants) gets their beef from South America.
I definitely try not to preach because what works for my lifestyle might not work for someone else. I don’t want people to judge me based on what I eat so therefore I try not to judge people based on what he/she eats. Though it was difficult with a former roommate who considered KFC french fries a vegetable then would give me unsolicited nutritional advice…
I love this post Mama Pea! I feel like the people I work with need to read this. They are always asking me in a very condescending way, why I don’t eat something, or don’t want something. I don’t want to bring up a whole debate so I just end up not answering or saying I don’t like it. Some people can just be rude though!
I love all of these points and have related to each of them in one way or another over the years. I really relate to not wanting other people to think I’m judging them and their food choices…and at appropriate times I’ll be more vocal but I usually wait until someone asks me a question.
My niece only wears dresses.
I think you’re very right about a lot of things. For the party I went to over the weekend, I made vegan gluten free cupcakes. Sure, the main reason I made them was just because I wanted for there to be something I could eat. But they also worked for someone who was intolerant to dairy. And people who just like cupcakes loved them, too. I think it’s great when you can share food and recipes and have people enjoy them.
As someone who isn’t vegan but is conscious of the meat choices I make, I can say you’re doing the better thing by leading by example than being militant. Nothing turns me off more than being force fed vegan thoughts, especially since I’ve already given the topic much consideration and come to my peace on the matter. On the other hand, when you lead by example, offer good vegan recipes and the like, that gets me more jazzed about enjoying a meal without meat.
Good post. I like that the examples/tips aren’t vague but instead, actionable.
This is something I struggle with on a daily basis. I am constantly questioned and sometimes attacked about my food choices. I find this very strange since I would never say to someone “You are eating meat! That is so weird and disgusting!” OR “You are smoking! That will kill you!” OR “Wow you are really unhealthyily overweight there aren’t you!” I think even though I do not say anything just by me being vegan and eating in front of others they feel judged. I did come up with a good answer today for a question I am constantly asked which is “Do you feel better since you became vegan? ” My answer is always no because I have been a vegetarian for 15 years so I do not feel better from being vegan. From now on I think I am going to say I feel better about the food choices I am making and how they relate to the environment and to animal welfare. Good post as always MP and very thought provoking.
I really love this post. When going over for backyard parties, I always ensure I can bring something I can eat, and try to snack before hand (also this helps me with avoidnig a mega attack of the sweet tooth). When my hubby and I started dating I was a vegetarian, and never had any problem with his meat eating choices, I sitll don’t (though I eat fish now). I’ve always said it’s a personal choice, and other’s food choices don’t offend me in the slightest.
I try to never mention the word “vegan” at food events, either. Except then someone asks, “Oh, are you vay-gun?” Since I also HATE correcting people, I just smile and say, “Yes,” and think WHY didn’t I just SAY I was vegan to begin with?
I find that bringing a dish or talking to the host ahead of time is one of the best ways to not only make sure your needs are accommodated but that the host/company is more gracious about your food choices. As far as the comments go about them (which some of the comments have talked about) I try to remind myself that people’s comments about my food choices are usually more of a reflection about THEM – and their insecurities. Of course I have to remind myself about this over and over if I’m fuming….
This is such a wonderful post!!! I always like to ask what I can bring when I go to dinner parties etc too
I find that it is a great way to bring a dish that I know I can eat – and share it with my friends too!
Like others have said, I love this post! I’m not anywhere close to being a vegan but I do choose to eat as close to 100% organic as possible, no processed foods, not a lot of soy, blah blah you know…my own personal set of food rules. It drives my family nuts as they adore fast food. So reading your tips definitely will help me. I tend to get preachy sometimes and I realize that’s not winning anyone over.
Love the kid’s pineapple/veggie pepperoni pizza! I want that!
Thank you, thank you, thank you for this post! I agree that it’s best not to force beliefs down anybody’s throat, so I haven’t gone that route. Although I’ve done ok with social situations in the 7 months I’ve been a vegetarian, it’s helpful to read about how other people maneuver shared meals.
I love how you describe it like pants verse dresses. I REALLY like the analogy. Gotta think of my personal eating choices at pants vs. dresses.
I like how you explained here that everyone’s choices are okay and they make us unique and different and that’s a good thing. As long as we do what works for us and our health, that’s the right thing. I just did a post about why meat works for me and I loved reading this the day after. I think what we really need to do, as food/healthy living bloggers, is respect everyone’s choices! Yay!
I am always so impressed with how you talk to your girls, and how you utilize things that they are familiar with to make the point more personal. I foresee 2 very intelligent, exceptional and accepting women in your future!
And if you manage to score that recipe, do share!!
I think these rules apply for any sort of dietary choices folks might make. You’ve made them gentle and polite, but they still hold on to their meaning. Thanks!
Thanks! Such great advice. So tactful…gonna copy the link onto my blog!
LOVE your blog! I’m by no means a vegetarian, much less a vegan but you definately inspire me to establish vegetarian and even vegan meals in my weekly routine. I’ve had TWO vegan dinners over the past two days. Yay nutritional yeast sauce and summer veggies! Keep making me laugh and learn…pretty please?
Can’t wait for the book.
This is a great post on a subject that truly affects a lot of people who are conscious or particular about what they eat for one reason or another, and it’s always a terrible thing to feel as though one may somehow be valuing a diet over time with loved ones. Thank you for addressing this concern so honestly and well — think I’ll post a blurb of + link to this on Twitter (@MasPublicHealth).
Oh, this is perfect. Loved this.
I found this post very enlightening! I really enjoyed reading your tips and advice on having different eating habits then people you are close with and it is very true, they shouldn’t get in the way of having a good time
I will definitely be sharing this post with others!
Thank you for this post! I love your and your family’s attitude towards your food-choices. My dad, for example, has been a veg for decades, and has had episodes of veganism, raw foodism, etc, but has NEVER pushed his beliefs on his family or friends. It’s a personal choice that can defs be shared with others tactfully.
If only everyone (coughPETAcough) had this same attitude – with regards to anything, really..
izzyy
xox
“but there have been times where I’ve tried a non-vegan dish or went to a restaurant that wouldn’t have been my first choice because being with my friends and family is more important to me than being vegan. “—I think this is a very important point! I would say I am 99% vegan. There is trace dairy that enters my life and I’d rather not freak out about the less than 1% of what I ingest because, well, I can’t make or prepare everything in my own kitchen, 100% of the time. In fact, I have a post going out tomorrow about the intentional? mislabeling of commercially prepared foods by co’s…either by choice or by ignorance, either way, not acceptable for those of us w/ food allergies. Thank god I can “live” with trace dairy sneaking in, whereas trace gluten, and I am miserable.
The point is that I’d rather let that 1% just be. And not stress me out. Than be 100% about veganism, and be 100% stressed, b/c it would do that to me. I think it’s great that you have a little leeway in your life, too.
To everyone who wants to know about kids/veganism…for us,I am not fixing meat but if in her own time, at her own discretion, if she eats meat b/c she chose that, then fine. I mean, what can I do other than lead by example and also embrace choices and diversity, even if one day that means my kid turns out to love filet mignon LOL
Great post, S!
Great post! I love how you approach the way you eat. I try to do the same. I used to preach a lot but realized it never really got me any where. So I stopped and just did my own thing and let others do their own thing. I try now to lead by example, showing others that eating mostly fruits and veggies is not boring, full of flavor and taste great! I try not to be a pain anymore when eating out or hanging out with friends, with my food allergies I just don’t really eat and eat before leaving or eat when I get home.
Just caught up on your posts! I love your thoughts on this topic. Restaurants + eating with friends can be difficult sometimes, even if you’re just a vegetarian. It stresses people out! I have found that the blog intimidates people too…they think I’m “fancy” and are scared to cook for me. It actually makes me feel really bad! I try to stay as positive and easy going about it as possible. Luckily, Colorado is a great place for vegetarians. — Also, about Nancy Negative a few posts ago. Won’t even get into the ridiculousness of what she said…BUT I will tell you that you are making LASTing memories for your beautiful family. My earliest memory is at my third birthday. I can still picture the cake my mom made for me and the table I was sitting at. Your daughters will remember all of the fun you have together all day long and cherish it for the rest of their lives. I’m glad you were able to hire someone to help scrub down your house. I thought of 2 things when I read that. 1 – You recognize that you need a break and a little help. You cannot possibly do it all and it was a healthy decision to make!! You have a full time job caring for the girls and a full time job writing a book. Yowza. 2 – You gave someone a job. Things are not easy for a lot of people right now, so I’m sure whoever is cleaning your house is grateful for the extra paycheck. — That is all
xo
Love this! I do the exact same things as you and you know I can boogie down with a steak.
It really does just come down to choices and common sense. It can totally be done with ease and grace. 
I have been reading your blog since I went vegan several months ago. It is by far my favorite blog. Every time I read it I find a delicious new recipe (that even my meat-eating hubby will love) and I get a really good laugh. Your sense of humor really comes through in your writer’s voice. I recently started my own blog about going vegan and I was wondering if you had any tips for me. What are some issues you faced when you first started blogging? How did you get the word out about your blog? If you have any helpful advice to offer I’d really appreciate it : )
Hey Sarina, thanks for the compliments. I’ll try to get an email off to you soon with any advice I can offer.
Great post. It’s so easy to get riled up about being vegetarian/vegan or even selective about the meat you eat (which is how I am). I think I’ve definitely offended a few people by talking about my personal beliefs regarding food. Thanks for the reminder that it’s not necessary to do that
This is such a great post! It’s something I have been thinking about a lot lately. I love your connection to wearing pants
Great post Mama Pea, and I agree, friends and family are more important.
Please share Deb’s recipe if possible. Her salad looked extra creamy and delicious.
Love the photo of Gigi with the Daiya, and love the pants/dress example you gave her. You’re one wise mama!
Thank you for this wonderful post. I’m pregnant with my first, and already struggling to integrate my (now militant) pregnant, vegan, organic diet into my crazy, blended life.
One Thanksgiving, I brought a few vegan side dishes to an extended family gathering. At first, I was a little heart broken that very few people even tried the broccoli salad from my garden, but the next day I invited all my vegan family over and we had a leftover Thanksgiving.
To me, it’s all about making lemonade out of lemons. Or hummus out of chickpeas.
Thanks for the moral support.
i loved this! as a new vegan, sometimes i’m at a loss when people criticize me. thank you thank you thank you mama pea!
p.s. – your blog has been a WEALTH of help/knowledge for me as i’ve made my transition. bless you!
-rebekah
That was just wonderful! A great way to handle explaining/making people comfortable around an alternative eating style, and showing them that vegans and vegetarians are not a glum lot.
Can be applied to lots of other areas where it’s not necessary to explain yourself as well! Loved it.
I think bringing your own dish is huge. It helps introduce others to the food and also releases some of the burden of “how do I cook for them.” My in-laws are always asking what they can fix for my parents but it’s always so much easier if they just have fresh veggies around and my parents bring a side/main dish that will serve as their main dish. That way no one has to worry if something will have too much salt or too much oil for my parents to eat.
I definitely agree with the mindset of “share if asked.” If people want to know more about your personal food choice that’s great, but there are too many cases where some might “push” their agenda and that usually just makes people defensive. I know friends who have stayed with my parents have brought their own food (which my parents encourage), and by the end of the weekend will have discovered that the low-salt, low-oil vegan food is actually quite tasty. Had they been told that they would only be allowed to eat one type of thing… that would’ve put people on the defensive, instead they get the choice and it helps their ability to learn from another person’s lifestyle choice.
Great post. I feel like such an outsider when I go to dinners sometimes. I’ve learned that people don’t like or appreciate…or listen to, unsolicited advice – especially about their eating habits – especially when they’re very overweight. I learned that the hard way. On my boyfriends family. Woopsie!
Not to open the great cheese debate again – but I like Follow your heart mozzarella better than Daiya shreds. Crazy, I know
No debate! Thanks for the input. I will try it!
I often get the feeling that my mom is offended when I don’t eat some of the meals she makes. It makes me feel bad, hurting her feelings, but it’s also not right to compromise my diet, a diet that I have researched and believe to be the healthiest for me. I just made the switch to vegetarian and food like french fries, mac and cheese and other junk food is vegetarian and it’s hard for me to explain to people that I still don’t want to eat it.
My mom often says “so what’s your new diet these days, eating nothing?”. She thinks because I eat healthy and no meat that I’m not eating enough and it hurts my feelings. I’m not good – really bad – at sharing food with others. I make single serving meals for myself and turn a blind eye to the food my family eats, which is pretty disgusting. I need to work on that, making meals for my family that they will like that are healthy.
Great post!
I’m so sorry…I know how hard that can be. I think the best way to prove that you are still eating healthy and delicious food is to make them something great, say a tamale pie or a zucchini quinoa lasagna
thank you for this. I constantly have criticism with my eating. Even if i am sitting there minding my own beeswax my sister will throw a spoonful of whipped cream in her mouth and say ” don’t look at me like that not everyone eats like you!” Annoying!!
Personally, when I eat with my vegetarian friends, I love to go with the flow and eat what they’re eating. I’m not a vegetarian or vegan, but I often enjoy the cuisine. I find it weird that eating a meatless or even vegan meal is so foreign and alien to most omnivores. Ideally I try to eat meat only once a day, nobody needs meat at every meal regardless of how delicious it is!