Do You Remember?
How about a little Flashback Friday? Do you remember what happened in the Pea household a year ago today? If you are a new reader, which it seems like there are a few of you, I’d like to extend you a special “Hidey ho!” and tell you how happy I am to have you along for the ride. Please do not click away or unsubscribe because I said “Hidey ho!” Trust me, far more absurd things will come out of my mouth (fingers?). For... Read More
Things Are Getting Nutty
Today was one of those days when even the most common occurrences entertain me a little more than they should. I’d attribute it to the six hours of sleep I’m averaging per night. I know, I know. What can I say? Exciting things are happening, by which of course I mean the season premiere of The Hills. I awoke at 5:30 to the cries of Lulu from her crib, saying, “No! I don’t want to be a doctor!” I’m choosing... Read More
Attachment Issues
Thank you all for the congratulations and well wishes on my last post. Every single comment meant so much to me. I have hired a contractor to come raise our ceilings to allow room for my spacious head. I tried to answer all the questions you posed in the comments, so check there if you’d like more details. I’m happy you all are so excited because I am too. I’ll keep you posted on new developments as they arise, but for... Read More
A Pea Says Thank You
I’m sure my mother and Emily Post will cringe as they read this (whattup Em-P?), but I’ve always hated writing thank you notes. It’s not that I’m an ungrateful brat, or at least it’s not only that I’m an ungrateful brat, it’s that I abhor the task of sitting down after a birthday party, graduation or wedding and coming up with a creative way to show the gift giver than I know what it is that they bought... Read More
Peas On Film: Vegan Energy Bars
Can you handle your very first Peas and Thank You vlog? It’s everything you would expect: vegan baking, My Little Ponies, show tunes and more. We hope you enjoy…or at least don’t unsubscribe. I don’t think Paula Deen or Rachael Ray are going to lose any sleep over their job security. You can find the original recipe here. We’re keeping Gigi out of school today to work on her theme song composition. I won’t... Read More
Pretty Sucky/Pretty Lucky: Part II
As I’m sure many of you can relate to, I’m constantly writing in my head. The beauty of this is that many times when I sit down to write a post, I don’t even have to think. The words come spewing out like a full sippy cup of juice on my freshly Swiffered hardwood floor. Throughout the roller coaster of today, a brilliant concept popped into my head: Pretty Sucky/Pretty Lucky. “Wow, that has a great ring to it,”... Read More
It’s Earth Day All Week Long
We’ve been celebrating Earth Day all week long. I’d entertained the notion of making a plastic six pack-ring countdown calendar to Earth Day, but that would require purchasing a six pack, and since my recent experiences with coffee, I don’t trust myself to make responsible beverage choices. Monday I used the promise of Earth Day as a little tool in my Parenting Toolbox, which also contains Barbie band aids and copious amounts of... Read More
A Matter of Perspective
As some of you know, specifically my Twitter followers, I’ve been off of coffee (again) for exactly 166 hours, 23 minutes and 48 seconds. When you look at it that way, via a description stretched over seven numbers and three increments of time, it seems like an eternity. In actuality, it’s been a week– a long “still wearing my Breathe Right strips during my first set of squats, drank my way through an entire box of decaf... Read More
Pop Off!
Do you ever have one of those days when you want to pull your hair out? When it feels like you’ve got marbles and crayons in your shoes? There’s peanut butter on the ottoman. Your optometrist is holding your contact lens prescription hostage so you won’t call 1-800-CONTACTS. Your daughter spilled her Ochango juice (which sounds a lot like what’s mopped up after a Chad Ochocinco’s DWTS tango). It flooded the dining... Read More
Could It Be…Seitan?
Testing, testing…is this thing on? MP here. Sorry for the repeat posting. My host says that someone either intentionally hacked in to prevent you all from being able to leave comments (grrr….) or else you all are just seitan worshippers and the amount of traffic crashed the server. In any case, here’s this morning’s post. You never know, it might be funnier the second time around. I kind of miss midnight feedings. Lulu... Read More
Out of the Mouths of Babes
The girls had some choice words this weekend. So did I, especially when Gigi took my dry body brush into the shower with her. It’s called a dry brush for a reason, kid. I’ll let the girls speak for themselves: Gigi, upon playing Starbucks barista: “Mom, I’m making you decaf a soy latte.” Lulu, upon finding the cardboard cutout that held our new toilet seat cover (jealous?): “I’m an EGG head!” Lulu,... Read More
The Best Laid Plans
Poor banana bread. In a world of delicious baked goods, it’s never at the top of anyone’s list of favorites. I’m not sure it has to do with the bread itself, which, who are we kidding, should more accurately be called a cake, but more to do with the fact that no one ever plans to make banana bread. Banana bread is more of a tolerable accident. No one says, “Could you not make that flourless chocolate torte for my birthday? ... Read More
The Living Room Floor
Sometimes we sweat on the living room floor. I lost a bet on the living room floor. We dance to some tunes on the living room floor, find unexplained spoons on the living room floor. Sometimes we beach on the living room floor. We often teach on the living room floor. Perhaps conceived on the living room floor? Somebody peed on the living room floor. We laid a sheet on the living room floor. Tonight we did EAT on the living room... Read More
Muffin Wife
I’m building my husband a Muffin Wife. I’ve been so busy lately, that I surely haven’t been the companion my husband deserves. I fell asleep during GLEE for cripes sake. Only I could doze off during kids in costumes performing elaborate song and dance routines, mixed in with aggressive women in track suits. Hmm…come to think of it, that kind of sounds like my life. I may be sleeping right now. I’ve been awake long... Read More
Wiki-PEA-dia
Independent: adj.; not dependent, as in insisting on putting one’s coat on and refusing any and all help, despite having it on completely upside down. “Tummus”: noun; 1) a popular fictional locomotive; 2) a delicious Mediterranean chickpea spread, as in “Mommy, can I have some tummus and crackers?” Peencher Peencher: noun; 1) a protective kitchen accessory used to remove items from a hot oven; 2) a game designed... Read More
Date Night
If you have stumbled upon this post looking to lodge a complaint with, or in the alternative, propose marriage to the producer of the new Steve Carrell/Tina Fey movie, you are in exactly the right place. I haven’t seen it yet, so go ahead and tell me what you thought. You’d be doing me a favor since I am quite picky about spending $21.50 and two hours of my life with my butt crammed into a seat that hundreds of other strangers have... Read More
Potty Parties and The Spider That Wasn’t
My family owes an imaginary spider a big thank you this morning. Were it not for that spider, they’d have had frozen waffles for breakfast. Unfortunately for me, that spider was up far earlier than I wanted to be. “Is it time to get up yet?” Gigi asked in her best outdoor voice. I rolled over and swatted at the clock radio as if it were at fault for cutting short the dream I was enjoying. The blurry red numbers glared. 6:12. “Go... Read More
A Woman’s Work
When I was in law school, I dreamed of the day when I would passionately address a jury, asking that they serve justice upon a criminal who had heartlessly victimized a woman or a child. I spent hours poring over cases, highlighting opinions and spending every last dollar I hadn’t yet earned to pay for an education that would redeem itself in both salary and the satisfaction of working for the rights of women and children. Eight years later,... Read More
Defeating the Purpose
If you are getting married anytime in the near future, just know that no matter what you did or did not register for, you are getting a slow cooker. “But wait!” you are saying, “Crate and Barrel doesn’t sell slow cookers!” It doesn’t matter, you will get one. There are two camps of people in this world: 1) those who think that slow cookers are so amazing that they are lobbying for legislation that would allow them... Read More
The Great Compromiser
Compromise: something intermediate between or blending qualities of two different things –from the Merriam-Webster dictionary I am the Great Compromiser. The majority of the time, my role is spent mediating disputes between Gigi and Lulu, as in the hotly-contested debate over the lacy Victorian-style fan AND the pink feather Vegas showgirl crown. Only one diva is allowed one of the two items at a time, not because the two are completely... Read More
The “P” Word
Or the “Pea” word, if you will. Nah, two cutesy titles in a row might just be too much, even for me. There are a lot of words that you can’t say in my house, or a least a lot of words that will have you making a deposit in the “Swear Jar” if you do. You may recall that for a word to qualify as “Swear Jar”-worthy, it must only meet the definition of a word you would not want Gigi to walk into preschool... Read More
V.I.Peas
Among our Sunday traditions, like showing up fifteen minutes late for church and Lulu filling her diaper like clockwork in the church nursery (both which occurred yesterday without fail, Easter Sunday or not), is our weekly stop at Great Harvest Bread. We all love Great Harvest for their really delicious and healthy baked goods, but more importantly, their free slices of bread. Since we do show up every Sunday, we’ve become the local celebrities... Read More
Happy Easter
From our family to you! “Let the resurrection joy lift us from loneliness and weakness and despair to strength and beauty and happiness. ” ~Floyd W. Tomkins Read More
Hoppin’ To It!
Having kids makes holidays a whole lot of fun and a whole lot of work. I shopped yesterday for all the fun Easter basket goodies…with Lulu right alongside me. I was quite strategic in the process, though, and there’s no better natural high than knowing that you are pulling a fast one on your kids. I first sat Lulu in the front basket of the cart where I would normally put my groceries (you know, the part that the cart itself warns you... Read More
Let’s Get Linky
I just have a few highly unrelated, not terribly relevant, but still moderately interesting links for you: Jamie Oliver’s school makeovers (like those on Food Revolution) lead to higher test scores. Sign his petition to keep a Chris Farley-esque lunch lady from shoving Breakfast Pizza under Gigi’s nose this fall. Have you ordered Caitlin‘s Operation Beautiful book off of Amazon yet? Stella McCartney has designed Meat Free... Read More
Skewering Traditions
It’s April 1st, which means I have only a month and a half to convince Gigi that she does NOT want the Barbie Potty Training Pups for her fifth birthday. Why would I possibly want to buy my child a doll that emulates one of the worst responsibilities as a grown up? I might as well buy her “Spend the Holidays With Hostile Relatives Barbie” or “Mop Up the Two Bottles of Gourmet Root Beer That Your Husband Dropped and Exploded... Read More
