Same Old Story
I’m putting on my serious hat for this post, so bear with me.
As many of you are aware, this week is National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. While there have been some fantastic posts written in the blog world regarding the topic (please check out Gena’s amazing post, in particular), I can’t help but notice the negative messages regarding body image that continue to perpetuate our media. Yesterday specifically, two disheartening stories came to my attention.
I am by no means a regular watcher of The View, (I can’t understand Barbara Walters when she talks, and I wish I couldn’t understand Elizabeth Hasselbeck when she talks), but I did catch via E! News that Giuliana Rancic was a guest yesterday.
For those of you that don’t know, Giuliana is the host of E! News (may have caught that a time or two myself) and also has a reality show with her husband, former Apprentice winner, Bill Rancic. The topic of discussion on The View was the couple’s problems with infertility as they try to conceive their first child. Giuliana explained that her doctor told her she needed to gain weight.
From OK Magazine:
“My diagnosis was I wasn’t ovulating consistently and so my doctor recommended that I gain weight in order to start ovulating consistently,” she said. “He said five to 10 pounds, which I know isn’t a big deal but I had to bite that bullet because I work out every day of my life. I love feeling good, waking up, working out.”
“I finally did gain five pounds,” she said, and Bill said he’s working on her to gain a little more.
I was so disturbed by this story and my main thought was, “If getting to be at a healthy weight prior to conception is such a mental struggle, how is this woman going to handle the weight gain during pregnancy in order to have a healthy child?” I also questioned why the show was giving attention to their infertility problems when their difficulties lie in Giuliana’s own efforts to keep her body weight below the healthy range due to the pressure of appearing on camera each day and maintaining that “Hollywood image?”
Then I was hit with a second story in the same vein, also on E! News (clearly, I have a problem). The autopsy results were released yesterday regarding actress Brittany Murphy’s death on Dec. 20th of cardiac arrest at the age 32.
Amidst rumors of anorexia and illegal drug use, the coroner found that Murphy died of complications of pneumonia, multiple legal drug interactions and anemia. Regardless of her underlying asthma and pneumonia, it cannot be denied that Murphy was underweight and had obviously lost weight at least in part by her own efforts. And while it has not been confirmed that she had an eating disorder, the fact that she was so malnourished DID play a role in her inability to fight off the illnesses that killed her.
Both of these stories made me overwhelmingly sad that the lives of both of these women, and MILLIONS of other women are destroyed by pressures they feel to be a certain weight and to look a certain way. I am sad that I’ve been fed these images that have influenced my self-esteem, that my female friends and relatives are led to believe that they are less as people for not weighing less on the scale and that for the rest of my daughters’ upbringings, I will have to combat the complete disillusion that their worth is wrapped up in what they see in the mirror.
The only way I know how to fight these warped messages is to drown it out with one of my own. I wrote a post on teaching my daughters about body image last year, and though many of you have read this before, I thought it was only appropriate to repost it here now. It may be the “same old story,” but I don’t think it can be told enough.
Reader Sue asked:
Do you think you could do a post explaining maybe your philosophy for how you raise your girls to have a healthy relationship with food and body image? I’m interested because I want to make sure when I have kids that I set a healthy example but also foster an environment of zero food complexes and body image issues. I know some is inevitable, but my mom always was diet-y (she didn’t have a disorder in the traditional sense, but she definitely talked about good/bad food a lot and such) and it manifested itself in her daughters via eating disorders.
You are very thin, and though it’s clear you take care of yourself and seem healthy, I just wonder if your girls will associate your thinness with what you find beautiful, whether or not you say it out loud. That isn’t a criticism nor is it a judgment, it’s just that I’m thinking about all this in relation to how I’ll raise my own daughters one day. I really admire you with your kids and think you have a beautiful family, so I was just hoping you could talk about your philosophy about parenting and fostering positive body image.
This is such a hard question, especially given the fact that my girls are so young, but I am going to try to give you the most honest answer I can.
As far as skinny/fat, beautiful/ugly, good food/bad food, we just DON’T talk about it.
Ever.
We don’t own a scale. I never say, “I look fat” or “that has too many calories.” We don’t criticize the way other people look or their food choices. We just don’t.
I honestly think if you asked Gigi what a “fat person” looked like, she couldn’t tell you. It’s kind of funny and wonderful at the same time.
I appreciate Sue’s question of: “if your girls will associate your thinness with what you find beautiful, whether or not you say it out loud,” but I don’t know that that’s fair. I don’t think because I have dark hair, that that means I don’t find blondes beautiful or that because I wear my hair straight, that I don’t find Gigi’s curls adorable. The girls don’t see me as skinny or beautiful, they just see me as “MOM.”
While I’m aware of the fact that as the girls get older, and they become influenced by their peers and what others around them are saying AND eating, for now, we are just TOO BUSY…
…focusing on what our bodies can do, than what they look like…
Well, for the most part.
We are too busy balancing healthy foods with “sometimes” treats…
…moving for fun…
And because it makes us feel good about who we are…
…and what we can do…
I’m not the perfect mom, by any means. I’m sure I have made mistakes, and I’m sure I’ll make more.
But my girls know that their mom is SO much more than what she looks like, what she eats and how much she exercises, and growing up, they’ll know that they are loved for SO much more as well.
Beautifully said!
LOVE.MY.PEA.GIRLS! You say it so eloquently!
I grew up in a family that mentioned (well, still does) weight, shape, food, fat, thin, etc. I know without a doubt that it has had an effect on me but I know for a fact that I will raise my children without those ideas/concepts/thoughts, just as you have.
Have you seen Guiliana’s diet/exercise routine on her website? I stumbled upon it one day and long story short it is very extreme. No bueno.
Awwww – I loved this post!
You said it all
I´m a fan!
Have a great weekend!
Brazilian XOXO´s,
Gabriela
Such a beautiful post!
I have so much respect for the way you are raising your girls.
At one point in my recovery, I heard my little sister mention calories in something. I’ve never been more ashamed of myself in my life. Luckily, I think I am now a good role model of what healthy balance is, and I was able to stop just in time for both of us.
I remember you once writing about Gigi asking what “ugly” was. Although someday she’ll learn, wouldn’t it be incredible if she never had to? If those terms weren’t so prevalent in society?
Great post!!
You make me want to be a mama so bad!! Your girls are so lucky to have you!!
xo Jess
wonderful, Mama Pea!!! Whenever I am a Mama, I want to be a Mama like you. So you better still be blogging then, whenever it may be
wonderfully inspiring! i love that you raise your beautiful children in such a manner that they will be comfortable with who they are, no matter what lies in the big world around them. i know it’s difficult to hear all of these outrageous weight pressures in the media and everywhere for that matter, but it’s nice that your girls have the most important thing with them always, a loving and supportive family. thanks for addressing a concern for this matter. i believe that a lot of the pressure is subliminal, and really that is the hardest.
thanks and have a lovely day!
xox
This is a beautiful post. You are definately taking a very mature and responsible approach to raising your beautiful girls. Keep taking care of them and yourself. I am sure they will always look up to you. And right now I really look up to you, too. You are a strong and beautiful woman. Truly.
Wonderful post.
It sucks that we live in a world where you are criticized for being thin and I am criticize for being large.
That was truly beautiful and I hope that when I become a mother, I do as good a job as you.
I love my mom but I believe that a lot of my disordered eating habits were formed because of her bad habits and remarks. The good that came out of it is that I now have a strong understanding of how I want to raise my daughters.
I’ve seen some people post negative comments towards you but I have to say that right from the start, I thought that you were an extremely inspiring mother.
So glad you brought this post back because I’ve never seen it. I really like your approach of not talking about fat/thin beautiful/ugly.
I needed this today! I just got done w/ a couple hours of the tredmill to counteract a binge. Trust me, those two hours probably didn’t even make it neutral.
Tomorrow is a new day though, and I def look at you for inspiration!
have a lovely weekend!
P.S. I just realized I have a similarity with your daughters, both my parents are lawyers too! thats crazy.
Very inspiring post…it is a tricky balance making peace with my own weight struggles but not letting my daughter see or hear about them. My worst nightmare is that she will be fixated on this kind of stuff as she gets older.
You are doing a great job with your kids! Have a great weekend.
Now this is what I’m talking about. It made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. This is how girls should be raised. This is for a book. This is a picture perfect moment. This is beautiful. This puts a smile on my face and your doing it right. Your soo doing it right!!!
I just finished reading both the post you had linked to and your complete post which i had not read before. I honestly do not know what to say. There was something that apparently got to me through this post, it might be the fact that i am scared to death that my children will ever have a thought cross their mind that they need to try and alter their physical appearance to fit some sort of standard. Seeing the pictures of your girls and how happy they are had me choked up knowing that life is so simple at that age, and portions of society are hammering down pressure towards younger groups of children so much more. I hate that, and i don’t use the word hate lightly… But what i have come to notice in the past few years and increasingly more lately thanks to various literature and some great blogs (yours in particular) is that life is to be enjoyed, and worrying about what might be or was; is not productive nor will it ever lead anywhere positive. I struggled for my first two years of undergrad with disordered thinking, and when i looked at pictures of myself back then, the word hate used to ring through my mind over and over again. If i had one wish in the world it would be that no one would ever have to go through anything like that, ever. But i am glad i did, because it was one of the greatest learning experiences in my life, and my body appreciates me much more for it now. You can probably figure out from past comments how much i appreciate people like you in this world for bringing joy and strength to people everyday whether it is putting a smile on their face or motivating them to jump-start their way into a healthy lifestyle. Although i have only been reading your blog for a few months, you remind me constantly to pass on positive vibes to others and in this post in particular; to forgive myself for the deprivation i put my body through in the past and only reflect if it will benefit others! I have trained a few teens in the past that have gone through some of the same issues that i have, and i share my story with them to prove that they too can overcome, but i don’t feel like the blog world needs to hear any details of my bump in the road… Just that it’s in my rear-view now and it can be for everyone else as well! Great post.
I never saw that post before, so thanks for sharing again. I love and respect the outlook you have on raising your family. You do an amazing job balancing everything and I hope I can be like that one day whenever I have kids of my own. I have learned so much! Thank you mama pea
I love the picture of you and gigi cheering! You’re an awesome mom, and i’m sure your daughters think so too. I hope you guys have a great time on vacation
I love the dancing, hula, and ESPECIALLY the yoga picture. I hope that if I’m ever a mom, I’m cool enough to do yoga with my kids…on pink and purple yoga mats nonetheless. Awesome.
you are my favorite blogger ever!! for sho. i like how you dont just post about your food, or just your kids, or just your exercising or just your veganism. i like that you are hilarious and compassionate and serious and caring and that you refuse to get washed up in all the pressures (being a mom, wife, media pressures, comments, etc) you just live your life and happen to have a blog that features its parts. i hope that you will keep doing what you do on here, but i also understand if you ever choose to stop, because living your life to the best of your abilities is the most important, and i’m reminded of that everyday i read your blog.
My roommates and I watch E news almost every night during dinner, and we always comment on how skinny she is – and she’s not naturally that thin as they’ve shown pictures of her from high school and younger years. And I’m constantly wondering how on earth she can get pregnant so skinny. I saw that little blip of her on The View yesterday, and I was disturbed as well at her “FINALLY gained THE 5 lbs”. Finally? Hon, you need more than 5 pounds to just look healthy besides just to get pregnant. I agreed with what the hosts were saying – she’s beautiful, she’s married, her husband loves her no matter what…wouldn’t she rather have a child then really be that vain about her looks?
Okay, rant done
Awesome post – wish I could give you a hug (even if I now know I’d only come up to your waist). Thanks for reminding us what’s important in our pursuit of health!
Thank you so much for putting up that post again. It’s truly inspiring and you all seems to have the joie de vivre. It is so hard to escape the images and pressure the media puts on us, especially women. I think it’s so important to acknowledge it, address it, and speak out against it. Thanks Mama Pea
Love this post! What a tough topic for so many people, us included. We have struggled with body image for our whole life, though we are getting better at
We are starting to appreciate our bodies and the life that we have 
You are so inspiring!!!
The was an awesome post. You are my “momspiration”. I hope when I have kids I’m half as good a mom as you. I’ve stuggled with fat talk my whole life and I’ll be damed if I pass it on to my future kids.
You da bomb baby.
I know I say it all the time, but I think you are a wonderful mom, and that just shines through from your posts. I saw the View episode and I was so sad for her…I mean she is saying how badly she wants to get pregnant, but she won’t gain the weight. Just really sad.
I watched that episode of the View! I missed that part about the weight- but it definitely crossed my mind as she was talking about her infertility. That’s too bad that she used her platform and visibility to say something like that, and it shows that eating disorders, and just the mindset in general doesn’t just affect young girls. I think having kids was/is my biggest motivation to leave my past in the PAST, and move on to be a happy and healthy woman.
But if they come out with a show, “23 and pregnant”…u never know..
;D Love u mama pea, funny or serious!!
Beautiful post!!!
This was amazing. I hope I am as great of a mother as you are mama pea, you are wonderful. Your girls are going to grow up and realize how amazing you are, doesn’t matter what you look like!! That’s SO sad about Giuliana, five pounds? Seriously? She would rather look that thin then be a mother?! She’s going to have a huge wake up call when she gains all that weight through pregnancy, you are so right! I’m glad at least the hosts said something. It’s so incredibly sad, this distorted opinion women have these days. Thank you for writing this. Again, you’re amazing!
First of all, your girls are adorable. They look so full of energy and life. Beautiful post, what a great message.
While I did develop a great relationship with food (I just always loved food) and never worried about numbers, I do have problems with looks/body image. I am convinced a big part of this is hearing my dad criticize my mom’s and other women’s appearance. I adored my dad and wanted nothing more than his complete approval. He never said ANYTHING about our appearance and loves us unconditionally. He is an amazing father, but still managed to damage us all ( we are three girls) just by making remarks without thinking.
Thanks again for this post!
- Christina
amazing post… Speaking from personal experience, i know how mothers can have a huge negative influence over their kids and the way they feel about themselves. I think its amazing how you raise your kids and it is my goal to raise mine knowing that their bodies are beautiful but also just not focusing on that and focusing on just living. Peers and people OUTSIDE the family will always come in the way of how you raise your kids but if u raise them right from the start, it’ll be harder to penetrate the goodness you’ve taught them.
Awesome post. When I have kids, I know I’ll be reading a lot of your posts for guidance and inspiration!
I loved this post the first time, and I loved reading it again.
However, I have one thing to say about Giuliana. It’s really, really sad that she is in that situation, but I’ve read so much about it and most people seem to place the blame on her. There are definitely girls who maintain an unnaturally low weight or strive to achieve something superficial because they are influenced by the media. This can manifest in a lot of different ways, and it can certainly contribute to “disordered” thoughts, but this is in no way equivalent to a true eating disorder. Eating disorders can emerge in women who are strong and smart – and know that magazines and the media are illusions. Anorexia isn’t simply maintaining a “look” for vanity, it’s about control, as I’m sure a lot of readers here know. I think it’s a shame to assume that Giuliana Rancic is just putting too much “effort” into a false ideal. There are plenty of women who do simply succumb to pressure – and those cases are no sadder or less difficult – but there are also those who suffer from a true disease, and we should have compassion.
Love this post, love your blog!
Wonderful post Mama Pea.
I love that you don’t own a scale and that your girls don’t even know what “fat” means. You’re a good mama!
Literally just saw that E News story about Rancic and it annoyed the heck out of me. Like really? I have always thought she looks rather unhealthy, and I balk whenever she talks about her “love” of working out.
The View should be ashamed for actually addressing that issue at all. I agree with you that there is a much bigger problem at hand than her inability to conceive.
Thank you mamma-pea. from the depths of my son and I’s hearts. you make me a better person and a better mom, seriously.
Great post Mama pea!!!
I’m going to sound 80 when I say this, but I remember this post like it was yesterday. It made such an impression on me then, and I am glad to re-read it now
I don’t know what else to say but thank you SO much for this post.
I wish I could have grown up in a household where I didn’t learn the phrase “thunder thighs” at a very young age and had a mom who didn’t use sweets as the cure-all for a bad day, good day and everything else in between.
I am so determined not to make the same mistakes when I have children of my own, which is why I need to get over my own negative self-talk and banish weight talk (and especially the “f word”) from our house.
Such a beautifully written post.
And I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again now…you mix in treats and good eating just as much as moving for fun that your girls wouldn’t know anything else. They just love you and their life and that is what matters.
Everyday I look forward to reading your blog. This Post really touched home base for me though, I am a recovering anorexic and bulimic, through yoga and a vegan diet I am learning to love and accept my body every single day. I hope that when I decide to have children I can be half as good as a mother as you are. Thank you for inspiring me, putting a smile on my face and making me laugh everyday
Hi, Mama Pea -
I am curious to know if the ‘malnourished’ label you attached to Brittany Murphy, and the fact that she was ‘obviously underweight’ was part of the coroner’s report, or if it is your take on the situation? Both of those angles seem to be different than what I have heard other media outlets report. Obviously we both should be spending our Saturdays on more meaningful activities than analyzing a celebrities’s cause of death. However, just as I feel that it is wrong to make judgements about people who are overweight, it is also unfair to judge people who are thin. There are so many reasons (some of them perfectly legitimate) why people are not at a weight that society feels is ‘ideal’. I feel like without walking a mile in someone else’s shoes it is impossible to ‘know’ enough to hold someone up publicly as a bad example. I hope that you don’t view this as a negative comment or an attack, I think that you are a phenomenal mom, and I love your blog. 99% of the time I agree with your message, I just feel like criticizing the weight/weight struggles of people you have never met, is not doing anything towards creating a more positive and accepting society.
Karen
absolutely beautiful post. so smart, so genuine. and so true. you are a great example, even for those of use w/out kids.
I remember when you posted that the first time, and i loved it just as much the second!
-and the girls have gotten so big!!! you really dont realize how fast it goes by, but loooking at the older pictures…wow they grow up fast huh?!?!
Such a beautiful post!
I remember the first time you posted it, but I really appreciate reading it again. Just squashed the “fat talk-ing voice” right out of my brain. Thank you, Mama.
This is a wonderful post. My daughter is young too and I really hope that I can be a good example of healthy to her. I hope that she never faces some of the issues I used to battle with food. I think you are a wonderful example of balance to your daughters and an example of enjoying life.
Thanks for the wonderful post, M.P.
Juliana has larger problems than infertility if the thought of gaining 10 lbs in order to conceive is stressing her out and she simply can’t bring herself to do it.
As you and I well know, parenthood is the hardest job in the world. Until a person is parent, you just can’t understand the depth and magnitude of this job. And 10 lbs really shouldnt matter and if it does, she needs to address that issue, first! Because really, your child at 3am does not care if you weight 120 or 180. They just want to know they can have milk, and a hug. Your child does not care if you’re a size 0 or 14. They just want their mom to spend time with them and not at the gym. I could go on and on. Clearly, she is suffering and needs help. Nature has a safety valve in that she won’t be able to get pg til she addresses her other issues first.
I remember the other post like it was yesterday…and wow, your girls look so little back then. They change so fast (as i sound like a grandma now!)
Great post!
Great post! I love seeing your girls pictures… they’re soooooooooo pretty and adorable! it makes me sad that you won’t post more of that.
I really like the idea that your girls don’t know what’s being a fat person…. I think that’s great that they don’t judge people by their weight, but by people’s hearty and personality!
Beautiful post Sarah! Those celeb stories are sad — I think that when someone as young as BM dies of cardiac arrest it is typically, although not always, because of anorexia (in other words, death by ED) — but I love how you are countering that message by raising your girls right. That’s all we can really do. I hope that one day I have the courage to raise my daughter’s in a similarly positive environment where we focus on all the things we can do and not how we look!
That was beautiful!
can yoube my mom? Honestly,I think youre giving the girls the best gift by just letting them be kids! why make them think about this stuff soearly on? I think by the looks of it, they seem pretty confident and feel beautiful. for what more could a mom (or dad) ask?
MA
Your girls are sooo beautiful. What a wonderful message you are sending. I think too many of us grew up with parents who were dieting/complaining about their weight/etc. Obviously we have been influenced. Like many things, it starts at home. And so does change.
I’m so mad that you disagree with me that you are the smartest person I know.
Every post you write just supports that more!
I can only hope that one day I’ll be lucky enough to be a happy healthy (and SMART) mommy just like you.
XOXO,
Erin
great post Mama Pea. you are an inspiration!
Loved this post! You are so humble – I truly know through your words, your blog, your pictures and just who your girls are that you are a wonderful mother! Not only that, you are wise – so very wise. Thank you for this post.
wonderful posts…and nice TEAR jerker ending with those adorable pics of your girls. I think every woman no matter how they are raised will have some sort of insecurities. As long as they have a supportive network around them, these insecurities won’t manifest themselves into tragic endings. I agree about guiliana, if she can’t weight FOR the pregnancy, she’s going to have a hard time DURING.
just beautiful.
Thank you…that’s it, just thank you.
I LOVE this post!
I couldn’t agree more, all around.
I did happen to catch The View (hehe, saw a promo for the show on infertility and couldn’t help Tivoing it. It was interesting to hear all these women talking about these things that I’m becoming all too familiar with. I can applaud Giuliana and her husband for speaking out about their issues, but at the same time it made me kind of angry. My doctor told me to gain some weight too, and I’m certainly not as thin as Giuliana. I’m sorry but there is no way that woman has gained 5 pounds, and her inability to put on even a small amount to have this thing she supposedly wants so much is ludicrous.
I worry about passing my food issues on to my children, but I think my consciousness of it will help, as will having them in the first place. When I get pregnant I will be so ecstatic and concerned with having a healthy child that I won’t care how much weight I gain! Weight can always come off if you have the discipline.
I saw that same episode of The View and also read the recent reports on Brittany Murphy. It seems sad to me that someone like Guiliana is forced to choose between upholding society’s standards of what is beautiful and accepted (being thin) and starting a family. I so wish all of this obsession with being thin, negative body images, etc would just disappear, but unfortunately I can’t ever see that happening.
I am so admirable of you raising your girls in such a way that they don’t think about, focus on or obsess over their weight or anyone else’s. Their perception of beauty is the way everyone’s should be (I think) and you ought to be very proud of raising them that way.
I agree with this post 100%. Seriously–the whole Guilana situation just makes me sick. Its so sad that Hollywood tries to sell us this “idea” that eating in a regimented, strict way while consistently working out translates to HEALTH and MAINTENANCE Its just wrong. Also, the fact that she refuses to gain weight TO HAVE A BABY makes absolutely no sense. Its so sad!
But you are such a beautiful mama and your girls are going to be so wise, beyond their years!
I think you are definitely teaching your girls the right thing. Life is too short for us to worry so much!
K
It’s funny, we have a lot of similarities in this, but I have two boys. I never talk about my weight, but others have commented (my mother in law) in front of my boys and that always bothers me. My kids as me about healthy food all the time. I love it because we have discussions about why we eat what we eat and how it fuels us. I do not deprive my kids of things because they need to experience different things, but they always prefer the “healthy”options that I make and boast to people about how good what we cook at home is and how…can you believe…it is healthy. I love teaching them there is more to life than cheese burgers and donuts (but everything is good in moderation!)
In light of the recent unnecessary personal attacks that you’ve endured, I hoped that you would be a little more sensitive about passing judgment on others within your own post content. You’ve had to defend yourself against people who criticize your thin build and insinuate that your diet choices contribute to your own susceptibility to illness, yet you are essentially saying the same thing about Brittney Murphy. You also go on to say that you don’t criticize the way other people look or their food choices. This also bothered me because I remember a post that discussed the abundance of processed food loaded up in consumer carts at Wal-Mart, in which you attached a photo of a morbidly obese woman in a motorized wheelchair. I’ve been reading your blog for a long time, both old and new, and can’t help but think that this post was a bit hypocritical.
Tara, I respect your opinion. My point was, hypocritical or not, I hope that my daughters do not look to TOO thin, unhealthy celebrities as their role models. I hope they value their health and their LIVES more than they do being thin, and I’ll do everything I can to help them learn this.
In all honesty, I RACKED my brain trying to think of the post in which you said I, “discussed the abundance of processed food loaded up in consumer carts at Wal-Mart, in which you attached a photo of a morbidly obese woman in a motorized wheelchair.” I think I finally remember the photo you spoke of, which the point/joke of the matter was the fact that the three members of the family pictured all had matching Thomas Kincaid-like winter scene fleeces on. No mention was made of the woman’s weight, nor was any judgment passed on what they were buying…I don’t remember being able to see that in the picture anyway.
All of that being said, what does that have to do with this post? I’m sorry if I’ve offended you, and if I’ve lost you as a reader, so be it. I’ve got a trip to pack for.
I remember that post from last year! You’ve raised your girls beautifully in world that values unhealthy appearances. The messages you’ve given them now will carry them through the rest of their lives. Bravo!
This is a topic well worth putting on the serious hat for–I hope I can be as clear-minded as you are in the future, when I am raising daughters of my own:)
I enjoyed this post. I grew up in a house where my mother was always talking about her weight, always on some diet or another (Medifast, etc.) and when I was 14-15 I developed a sort of rough eating disorder. I ended up getting better (and I am a believer that this is possible, but don’t think most people ever fully move on), but because of years of depriving myself/dieting and messing with my metabolism, I have a hard time maintaining weight, and often go up and down, up more often as of late.
Continue raising them right, at a certain point your blog may have to turn in a new direction, because pretty soon they may not want to be in the public blog eye–but maybe they will. Just stay true to what you think is right and for heaven’s sake never pull an Obama and call your girls chubby
Have a good night!
Oh, goodness…I love your pink yoga mat!
I have been lurking on your blog for a few months and I really enjoy it. I want to applaud you for having one of the kinder posts that I have seen about Giuliana’s struggles. I agree that Giuliana should gain weight to be healthier, and to ease their struggles getting pregnant. However, as someone who has struggled with infertility over the past 2 years I hate that she is being blamed for her infertility in the media.
When someone reaches the point of being infertile there is almost always more than one contributor, saying she should gain weight implies that if she gained weight she would get pregnant instantaneously. She is also 35, and she could have another disorder that keeps her from ovulating. I am only 27, normal wieght, and I have had 2 miscarriages and no successful pregnancies since we started trying when I was 25. I have used ovulatory drugs to achieve both of my pregnancies. People have said things to me that they thought were advice, but to the person going through the struggle definitley felt like blame.
I guess I just really feel for Giuliana right now. I felt like the ladies of the View could have been a lot kinder towards her, and as a fellow infertile person, I know how much advice can feel like blame.
Anyways, love your blog, and thank you for at least being nice about infertility:)
It’s true that eventually weight/body image/food are things that girls WILL become aware of and have to figure out how to deal with, but I think you’re right to spend the time being just leading by example and teaching them good habits. My mom has such a healthy relationship with food, and seeing her living a fit, healthy, and completely unrestricted life at 47 is enough reassurance for me that such a balance is more than possible, if you are careful to never eat, not eat, exercise, or not exercise to an extreme.
I have no doubt that your daughters will grow up with the same reassurance that, judging by their mother, good health is something completely attainable.
Thank you. I love this post. Weight is an issue in our house. My husband weighs a little more than twice what he should, and our second son seems to have inherited some of thosse tendencies. I have never really worried about weight, but want to be more physically fit. I never really worked toward it though, until I gained a bit this last year. I hope that we can get ourselves to a healthy place, without putting so much emphasis on weight and how we look. Five sons here, plus two nieces and my teen cousins (girls) close by.
What a wonderful post!
Great Post! I’m a 21 year old college student and an avid follower of your blog. I am from France and just like you with your children, my mom always taught me to eat right and be healthy. We eat organic vegetables and fruits at every meal.
When I moved away from home to study abroad in the US at the age of 16, I was overwhelmed by all the fast food around me and had to try everything from pop tarts to taco bell ( and i must add that there is no such thing as a taco bell diet! ).
After gaining almost 30 lbs in a year I went back home to my Mom and realized that she was making the right decision and she was the example I had to follow.
Today, I’m a super fit and healthy vegetarian who looks up to her mom for support and will be forever thankful for her being my role model and an amazing example.
I am glad your little girls will be able to do the same.
Thank you for your blog, I love reading it.
Have a lovely day,
Lucie
How lonely it can be for the celebrity not to eat the food that they like because they have to stay thin and look good on screen. Let’s enjoy life and eat whatever we want but have to make sure that we are eating healthy foods.
this post made me smile. that’s all i have to say
I’m late getting to this post but I just wanted to say that I loved it, I love your attitude and your girls are very lucky to have you (and vice versa)!
This post made me wish the women in my life were less focused on their weight and body image when I was a little kid. I wish the emphasis was more on health and having fun and taking care of ourselves without looking at the size on our clothing tags and the weight on the scale.
Still love this post.
Maybe you should make a direct link to it on your sidebar!
hi!! (i’ll start by apologizing for any mistakes i make, my
first language is spanish.. hi from mexico). ive written before via
twitter (i even sent you a pic of my baby girl) i love your blog
and your recipes.. i laugh so much with your posts, but im new to
your blog, ive been reading maybe 2 months! (i found you via
gena!!!) i wanted to comment on this post, because i have been
stugling with an ED, i suppose most of my teens and adult life (im
25), and i have just recently realized, like 2 yeas ago, that my
mom has an eating disorder as well. i think i have always known
this, but it just recently became clear to me. why she woulnt play,
or talk, or take us to school, or the doctor, or give us a bath
(she had ppl to do this), she was busy eating and throwing up. and
cleaning… and i didnt realize i had an ED as well until i had my
second child (i have a 5 yr old and a 2yr old) and i started
feeling overwhelmed..it all came out. and now im in recovery, i
fight every day and its so hard.. and i also feel so irresposable
for having kids while being in this situation, i know its
different, me and my mom, because she wont accept it, let alone get
help, but im so worried ill pass this on to my kids, its hell, and
i would never want them to struggle with body image and food the
way i do every day.. anyway, just to congratulate you in trying to
teach your girls how to be healthy and happy. oh and by the way i
think going vegan has helped me so much, it has helped me connect
to food in a different way.. i dont think that it contributes to
EDs, i think its the opposite. im sorry for the super long post..
its just that it really hit close to home.. and i find it good to
talk about it (or write)..
MB–I am so sorry that your family has struggled with these issues. My heart aches for the pain that you and your mother have been through. I will pray for healing for you all. And I am so glad you have found solace in a vegan diet. Congratulations on your recovery. God bless you.