I’ve Cracked the Code!
I’ve got a small list of major mysteries I’ve solved in the last few days:
1. Supportive amazing father + “The Potty Book” + Dora Pull-ups + organic yogurt covered raisins = 100% potty trained Lulu!
You know you’d go right now if I promised you some too.
2. Vienna from The Bachelor = Angela Bower (Judith Light from Who’s The Boss?)
I nearly jumped off the couch last night, started my own ad agency and moved in my sex-crazed red headed mother and a strange tattooed Guido and his daughter when I finally pieced this mystery together.
2.b) Who’s The Boss? = Jersey Shore + Real Housewives
“AY-OH, OH-AY.”
3. Juicer pulp + spices +seasonings + 3 hours = delicious crackers.
I’ve been trying to figure out what to do with juicer pulp since I got my juicer. I’d contemplated trying to turn it into a compost pile in my backyard, you know, to give me guidance and advice when life gets hard.
Tempting, but we have enough stank going on in our house right now (see #1 above…and possibly #2?). Instead, I used a little recipe inspiration from Gena and some technique inspiration for Diana, and came up with a tasty, almost raw, dehydrator free cracker.
Juice Pulp Crackers
- 2 c. juice pulp (I used kale, celery, romaine & lemon)
- 1/4 c. ground flaxseed
- 1/4 c. ground raw almonds
- 1 T. nutritional yeast
- 1/2 t. salt (more or less to taste)
- 1 T. tamari
- 1 T. vegan Worcestershire sauce
- 1 clove garlic minced
- 1/2 t. cumin
- 1 T. water (more or less for consistency)
Combine all ingredients and stir until you have a thick batter, like a thick cookie dough.
Spread batter on a lightly oiled cookie sheet until about 1/4 -1/2 in. thick, and place in your oven on its’ lowest setting (mine is 170 degrees).
Bake for an hour, then carefully flip over and bake for another hour.
Cut baked blob into cracker shapes, spread out and bake for an additional hour (this will be the third hour) with the oven door ajar.
I was skeptical at first, but then the girls and their friends who we had over for playdates came and wanted to try them. The next thing I knew, they were shoveling them in off the cookie sheet like they were potato chips. I wanted to yell, “Noooooo! Those took me three hours to make!!!” but then I reminded myself that they were eating warm, smelly, dried out garbage, er, I mean kale, flaxseed and celery. I guess I’ll just have to make another batch.
I’ve got one more code to crack tonight…
4.
Somehow I don’t think yogurt covered raisins, 80′s TV shows and dehydrated trash is going to help me out of this one.
Vienna looks like Judith Light who looks kind of like a man. So does Vienna = a man? I just don’t GET it!! What is Jake thinking? Must be some creative editing going on.
So happy you got Lulu potty trained. That will be a load off your back
LOST was amazing and I’m still confused as ever.
I really excited about that last one …. and wondering how I figure out how low my digital oven goes…keep pushing in numbers starting at 120 and see which one stays on?
Ah! And Judith Light is also on Ugly Betty! I have been trying to remember her name forever!
LOST. I don’t watch the show religiously. I just pick up bits and pieces from when Matt watches it. You can imagine my utter confusion.
Congrats on a potty-trained Lulu
Oh, and what, Worcestershire sauce isn’t typically vegan?!
I used to LOVE Who’s The Boss!!! Good memories. Now that you mention it, the whole premise was rather sketchy…
Those crackers look great; I’ve never juiced but you’ve inspired me to seek out a juicer so I too can make crackers. And juice, obviously.
too funny bout the nooo, these took me 3 hrs to make. i sometimes feel that way about some of my delicacy desserts i slaved over but it’s like oh,i can make more. we live in america. there is always more. no worries
juicer pulp is something i dont have b/c i hate juicer cleanup. LOL
and i dehyd at 155F ish. Never 105. That would take a 2 hr job into 6. Plus food core temp never gets that hot, just the air. Hey, I’m a high raw, not all raw! LOL, vegan
lol OMG you are totally right! no wonder why she rubs me the wrong way!
Congrats on Lulu being potty trained! That is wonderful.
Congrats LuLu on the potty training! Can I sympathize and say how relieved I was when our shorkie was finally trained and we got to quit cleaning up pee stained carpet?! :> I know. Not the same… Ryan’s watching Lost. A friend said, “If I hadn’t invested 5 years in this, no way would I be watching!”
Yeah Lulu!!!!!!!!! Way to pee in that potty.
I just had to commend you on featuring “Madame Trash Heap” from Fraggle Rock. Best show ever, in a totally creepy & disturbing way.
That’s so great that the girls liked the crackers so much! I’ve been needing to make something with my leftover pulp too, but I’m kind of intimidated by the cracker idea.
I’ve never seen Jersey Shore, but apparently Pauly D is coming to host a “dance party” at the university I teach it, and I’m really tempted to go, in a sick way.
Congrats to Lulu!
I am very impressed by those crackers! The look amazing!
No code breaking for LOST??? I guess I’ll just have to keep watching!
YAY FOR POTTY TRAINING!!!!!!!!
And Lara: Worcestershire sauce has anchovy paste in it, so its not vegan
Congrats about Lulu! Those crackers are a great way to use up “garbage” food. I’m always looking for ways to use up those leftover parts no one wants. Thanks!
love the cracker idea! One thing I have done with my juicer pulp: make them into yummy little sandwiches. Mix the pulp with chopped up broccoli, a little cheese (almond cheese for you?) and then wrap some type of whole wheat/almond meal dough around them. So good! my kids love those too.
Hooray for Lulu!!
Those crackers look pretty darn tasty
“I’ve been trying to figure out what to do with juicer pulp since I got my juicer. I’d contemplated trying to turn it into a compost pile in my backyard, you know, to give me guidance and advice when life gets hard.”
AWESOME! In fact Scott and I were just talking about Fraggle Rock the other day and how Scott only saw it a few times. Yeah, I have no idea who this guy is either sometimes. Anyway I can get it via streaming Netflix and I’m totally going to watch it because I am a dork.
I love the coverage of guidos in this post. FIST PUMP!
i have a 2 year old who needs potty trained! any advice, what was your secret??
Maybe it’s just me, but I thought that Judith Light person was Paula Deen about 100 pounds lighter
Oh man, references to Who’s The Boss and Fraggle Rock totally made my day! “The trash heap has spoken, nyyahhh!” And Lostwas awesome last night, although Claire creeps me out.
I still have to catch up on LOST but I heard it was a good one! 3 hours? I would have been rationing those babies off.
Nothing like a little positive reinforcement in the form of yogurt coated raisins to get that potty training over and done with!
Congrats on the potty training! And wow, what an amazing use of juice pulp, I love it when you don’t have to waste anything
Your ability to create recipes is pretty unbelievable! I am thinking that you were a professional vegan chef in your past life… You should really consider taking on the position as my fam’s personal chef when i am a famous doctor with my own show! Okay maybe you have a better chance of cooking for someone who is actually famous right now, but you should definitely write a little letter to the food network! I can see it now… Mama Pea’s Vegan Kitchen: Where good food and good parenting collide…
Hey, my mama always used food to get me motivated. She still does in fact. Some things never change…
If ya crack that LOST code lemme know. I have no clue what’s going on anymore!
If I could go on command–with only some prodding from free treats–I would be a much less cranky, bloated chica. Break that code and you’ve got yourself a million dollar idea!
Seriously good looking crackers though (the actual food, not the pictures of antiquated ’80s sitcom stars).
The Fragle Rock reference made my day.
At least they were eating healthy, fiberous snacks INSTEAD of potato chips, thanks to YOU! I don’t know if I’ll ever have the patience for those, but luckily the city picks up our compost in San Fran.
Those crackers sound really good. And if they pass the “kid test” they’re sure to be delicious! Now I just have to get a juicer so I have leftover pulp. Oh, and I’m guessing the pulp leftover from making almond milk would work for the ground almonds?
BOOO I’m so sad I used up all my juicer pulp this morning, I want to give these a shot!!
So exciting!!
Congrats on the potty training!!!!!!!!
I loved fraggle rock as a kid. Great show!
Hey, with Lost, you never know. I never saw that polar bear coming.
Thanks for the shout! Glad your dehydrator-less crackers worked out favorably. Much better (and potentially cheaper) than packaged crackers anyway. Chances are, your pulp supply will outrun your time to make crackers so at least it’s always an option to pop a batch in the oven. Key word being “option.”
Yeah Lulu! Good for her. We used to buy our oldest a movie every time he would poop on the potty (we had pooping issues here). It feels so great when you reach a goal like this. I am so happy for her! Big Girl!
Haha good for Lulu!!
Lost was intense last night!
What an interesting cracker!!! YAY LULU for getting potty trained, what a big girl!
Best blog post I’ve read in a while–Who’s the Boss AND Fraggles?! Love it.
dance your cares away…
worry’s for another dayyyyy…
let the music play
DOWN IN FRAGGLE ROCK!
Yay for Lulu being potty trained!
Totally awesome crackers! I’ll have to try your spin on my own
I hope the yogurt covered raisins (which are delicious, by the way) are consumed AFTER the potty! Not that I’m against snacking on the potty …
My juicer isn’t the best juicer, so the pulp is usually quite moist. Can you still use that for crackers? Or should I be squeezing the juice out of the pulp?
K
I think your crackers will just take much longer to dry out if your pulp is too moist. You might try wringing it out in a clean dish towel before adding the other ingredients!
“I wanted to yell, “Noooooo! Those took me three hours to make!!!” but then I reminded myself that they were eating warm, smelly, dried out garbage, er, I mean kale, flaxseed and celery”
Oh my word, I laughed so hard!